Satan’s Diary- September 2022

The Lord said to Satan, Where have you come from? Satan answered the Lord, From roaming throughout the earth, going back and forth on it.” Job 1:7 NIV

Dearest Diary,   

 I recently received third-quarter reports from all regions and I’m pleased to report all is well on earth and in hell. 

Seriously. 2022 has been good to me so far.

There are two “pet projects” I prioritized this year and both are off the charts successful. The first is the one I like to call “lies about life”. 

It’s going splendidly! Just splendidly! 

I have convinced the younger generations having a child is the very worst thing that could ever happen to them. Young adults have been raised to believe seeking pleasure is the highest value and self-sacrifice is for idiots. It was beyond easy to convince them parenthood is worse than cancer and prison combined.  Because so many believe this lovely little lie I concocted, those short-sighted chumps will do ANYTHING to maintain the right to kill their own offspring. It warms my icy heart to watch them march around wearing their “I Hate Babies” tee-shirts at their silly little rallies. Such fools! They don’t have a clue! They are so determined to keep abortion lawful they repeatedly vote for bungling and corrupt politicians simply because those politicians have vowed to keep abortion legal. They literally love abortion so much they willingly accept economic ruin to keep it. 

I AM A LITERAL GENIUS! I TELL YOU. LITERAL!

It is now fashionable for firms in the U.S. to provide “comprehensive abortion coverage” for their female employees. Companies pay for both an abortion and the traveling expenses to have the abortion. This as a major win for me AND for the company. The woman is damaged emotionally and spiritually by the abortion (whether she recognizes it or not). This damage is likely to lead to self-loathing and all sorts of other goodies for me, such as addiction, promiscuity and self-harm. 

I just adore addiction and self-harm. 

The corporations who participate in this ghoulish little practice win because they get to promote themselves as do-gooders and champions of women’s rights WHILE they weasel out of paying for the insurance costs for the birth of the baby, maternity leave and insurance coverage for the little parasite after it’s born.  I have no words for how much I adore corporate greediness disguised as good deeds! 

 Some fear losing the “right” to abortion to such a degree they are voluntarily choosing to have hysterectomies or vasectomies. Most are in their prime childbearing years. Such a win! Apparently, those morons haven’t heard of this little thing called birth control! I’m literally laughing out loud as I write this! I literally cannot wait until the day these fools realize what they’ve done all in the name of virtue signaling. 

LOVE!

Speaking of cutting off healthy organs. 

My absolute favorite most treasured project of all time “gender affirming care” is going better than I could have imagined.

It’s beautiful really. 

If a child shows the slightest bit of discontent with their biological gender then an army of school teachers, medical professionals, social workers and trans-activists swoop in to convince the child what they really need to do is explore the “gender spectrum”. 

I just adore the gender spectrum. It’s the best thing I ever came up with. Seriously. I’m a friggin genius. 

The child starts out by “transitioning socially” They choose their preferred pronouns, a new name and begin wearing clothing that matches their new gender identity. It’s very common for the child to decide they really are the gender they have been identifying as. I love this. Seriously, It’s so destructive to the child. It’s beautiful. 

At this point a teacher, counselor, doctor or social worker will suggest the child go on puberty blockers to “pause” natural puberty. The short-term side effects of “pausing puberty” include fatigue, menstrual disruption, headaches, insomnia and muscle aches. The long-term effects are my personal favorite. They can include loss of bone density, loss of fertility and loss of I.Q. So good.

SUCH A WIN! 

Most children who begin taking puberty blockers later take cross-sex hormones. Side effects of cross sex hormones include cardiovascular disease, sterility, cancer, mood swings and psychosis (WIN). The next step is having their sex organs cut off (BIGGER WIN!). Whatever they decide later, these children are left disfigured for life from this “medical care”. If anyone tries to object to this course of action they are assured the child will commit suicide if they are discouraged from transitioning. 

I just adore bullying. 

The child is left infertile by this little social experiment, which will cause them to become bitter towards all the adults who encouraged this idiocy once they grow up. As an extra added bonus they will never experience the emotional growth and maturity that comes with parenting a child! 

WIN! WIN! WIN!

Thanks to abortion, aggressive trans activism, government meddling, a failing economy, divorce, pornography and rampant sexual sin, the family is in tatters. I literally could not be more thrilled with this development. There is nothing I despise more than a happy, healthy, stable family.

Thankfully, most Christians don’t want to hear anything about any of it. It’s just too terrifying and icky. Most are too distracted by their own problems to care about the state of the world (winning!). Few tell others about Jesus. The vast majority have no clue what’s going on in their child’s classroom and more than half of them refuse to vote, the ones who do vote seldom think about or pray about what or who they’re voting for. 

Some don’t even attend church!

LOL! As if they’re going to survive without Christian community and fellowship! If this continues I will be running the whole place in no time! 

Until next time my dearest diary,

Satan 

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