Dear children, keep yourselves from idols~ 1stJohn 5:21 NIV
“Being nice” has become an idol we worship with wild abandon.
Before you exit out to write me a long comment listing detailing the countless ways people have become rude, vulgar and belligerent, read on.
I have not lost my mind.
It is true that there are many people in our culture who become aggressively rude, foulmouthed and abusive at the tiniest provocation. However, if you look at the context of their aggression; their hostility is nearly always directed at people who they categorize as hateful, rude or disrespectful.
It is never acceptable to be “not nice” anymore. Unless, of course someone else is determined to be “not nice”. Once the judgment of “not nice” has been established, literally anything goes. It is then acceptable to unleash untold hell on those judged to be “not nice”.
This insight came as I was reading an article. The writer of the article believes evangelical support for President Trump (rather than the churches lack of holiness or the average Christian’s reluctance to share the gospel) is hurting our Christian witness in America. He believes that it would be best for Christian voters to dump Trump and take our lumps with whoever gets elected next; rather than continuing to discredit the reputation of Christianity with support for the President.
The primary grievance the writer seemed to have with the President is not his with policies but rather his lack of politeness and absence of niceness. It is true there are those who do have issues with Trump’s conservative policies. However, they rarely attack his policies. Instead they focus endlessly on his lack of decorum, dignity and niceness.
Our collective obsession with niceness transcends the realm of politics. Despite laws safeguarding free speech there is an influential movement afoot to shut down any and all speech thought to be “not nice”. Racist, sexist and homophobic speech has been deemed the least “nice” speech because that sort of speech is categorically awful. Clever individuals have recognized that the most efficient way to silence speech they don’t like and to be given the go ahead to be “not nice” to the person speaking is to twist their speech into something racist, sexist and/or homophobic. Universities routinely suppress the speech of students who hold views considered “not nice”. These same schools regularly disinvite speakers whiny students feel are “not nice”. Professors have actually been fired from jobs for openly sharing views decreed “not nice”.
The Berkley city council has prohibited the use of gender specific pronouns in their city code because it is “not nice” to call someone a pronoun they don’t identify with. Berkley has determined that it is categorially “not nice” to offend a gender confused person or a woman or anyone so now a manhole cover will be called a “maintenance hole” and manpower will be termed “human effort” and brothers and sisters will now be called “siblings”.
Welcome to 1984 folks.
The entire west coast is being taken over by homeless people. Sections of entire cities are no longer fit to live in. Nothing is being done to correct this problem or help the homeless because it has been determined by mostly democratic leadership in those cities that it is “not nice” to make judgments about the lifestyle choices of others. Medical professionals will admit in their more vulnerable moments they are reluctant to tell patients they are overweight or that their lifestyle choices are going to kill them because they do not want to be perceived as “not nice” or “judgmental”.
The idol of nice has slipped into the church and is creating chaos. For years now, churches, even evangelical churches have systematically softened language concerning sin. In some situations, churches have stopped discussing topics—no matter how biblical those topics might be— because someone— somewhere might possibly feel those topics are “not nice”. The teachings of Calvinism have made serious inroads in recent years, even in denominations that are not traditionally Calvinistic. I suspect one of the reasons Calvinism has become popular is because Calvinism teaches Christians they never have to tell unbelievers they are going to hell or even evangelize them (decidedly “not nice” things). Calvinists believe it is the sole responsibility of the Holy Spirit to reach unbelievers and He does not want or need our help. If these strategies were effective I would support them, but they are not. Church attendance has plummeted and authentic conversions have become rarer. The vast majority of church growth in recent decades has been what experts call “transfer growth” or Christians simply transferring from one church or denomination to another church or denomination.
Idols must be dealt with decisively.
Christians must balance “niceness” with truthfulness in a culture that is literally dying before our very eyes (Ephesians 4:15, Ephesians 4:25). It is the ultimate in fiddling while Rome burns to worry more about being labeled “not nice” than to worry about the souls of people or the future of our civilization.