Satan’s Diary- May 2021

Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour- 1st Peter 5:8 NKJV

Dearest Diary, 

All is splendid in hell. Truly splendid! I just received quarterly reports from all regions on earth and the news is beyond magnificent for yet another quarter. 

2021 is shaping up to be another banner year.  

Deception has taken root literally everywhere. This is working out for me in ways I have only dreamed about in the past. My beloved pet project, spreading excessive fear has been a stunning achievement. I owe much of my success in this endeavor to COVID-19 and government officials. That sweet little virus is the gift that keeps on giving. 

Love! Love! Love!

Despite declining death rates and the availability of three (3!) vaccines many still live in abject fear of catching COVID-19. Governments everywhere have taken full advantage of the fear. Totalitarianism is right around the corner! I can feel it! There is nothing I love more than a good, old-fashioned dictatorship. Nothing is more helpful to me personally than when a group of corrupt, sinful, flawed humans decides they have the right or obligation to fully control the lives of their fellow humans under the guise of the “greater good”. The yearning to exercise control over others always ends in evil, despair and misery. There is nothing I love more than evil, despair and human misery.  

Ha! 

The peer pressure to obey “the COVID rules” is nearly unbearable for some. Many are so fearful of getting bellowed at by a meddlesome observer on the street they are terrified to push back against policies they know in their hearts make little sense. No government agency anywhere is admonishing their citizens to eat healthier food or exercise. Instead fully vaccinated people are wearing masks around other fully vaccinated people! Proudly! Ha! In the name of “science”! The bondage these people are in! It’s beautiful! Governments promote the lunacy knowing full-well its lunacy because fear expands their power! There is nothing I love more than a politician who believes they know what’s best for everyone else.  

So good! 

The children are suffering the most on that idiotic planet. The children who actually get to be born that is. Many don’t thanks to my friends in the abortion industry. Yet another incredibly successful venture of mine. Abortion is just such a fabulous industry. I’m a huge fan. Abortion is a multi-million-dollar business. Nonetheless, many believe abortion clinics are charities that help women out of the goodness of hearts. HA!  The whole industry is only about making money. No abortion providers in the history of humanity have ever “helped” anyone for free. They certainly won’t help a woman become a parent and yet I have managed to convince the world that abortion clinics actually care about women. 

I’m literally the best there is. Seriously.

But I digress. I was talking about the kids. Ah the kiddos. This generation of moronic nincompoops have found ingenious new ways to completely screw-up their offspring. I really couldn’t be more pleased. Progressive sex education has taken root in school districts all over the world and many parents are so caught-up in their own lives they have no clue what their kids are learning. Others are actually convinced that kids should learn gender is fluid and sex is only pleasurable when it’s as weird as possible. Those idiots actually encourage the destruction of their own children through these programs. Love! I literally cannot wait to see how neurotic and peculiar this generation of kids turns out to be.  I have a hunch the dysfunction will be unlike anything ever seen before in human history. So good!

But there’s more! 

Racial division is growing. It won’t be long before all the progress made by that ridiculous Civil Rights Movement is completely undone by the news media and politicians who use racial division to further their own selfish agendas. It’s already trendy to judge others by the color of their skin rather than the content of their character. Critical Race Theory has been tremendously helpful with stirring up division. In hasn’t hurt that much of the populace is too dumb to spot the obvious racism entrenched in Critical Race Theory.  Do-gooders now actively encourage and promote racism in the name of ending racism. 

I love dumb people. Seriously. I do. 

 Christians are embracing woke thinking in a big way. Some people just can’t stand not being adored by the “in-crowd” so they agree to whatever philosophy is popular in the name of “being inclusive and caring”. That “logic” has always worked in my favor.  I’m a fan. 

There is one bit of bad news though. I have heard some troubling reports from a few churches. Some pastors have become overly concerned with building spiritual health into their people. Discipleship is experiencing a resurgence. I hate discipleship. It promotes spiritual growth and I despise spiritual growth.  Others are encouraging their people to attend prayer meetings (Gross). Some Christians are praying more than I feel comfortable with on their own. Prayer is known to lead to a stirring of the spirit and that can lead to revival. I despise revival. It’s unquestionably the worst thing ever for me.  

Well, there is probably no need to borrow trouble. I will just try to get those stupid Christians intent on changing the world through politics instead of prayer. That will distract them. It works every single time. 

Sincerely,

Satan

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