Tag: Mothers Day

A Defense of Motherhood in an age of Disdain for Children and Family-

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

  Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from God. Psalm 127:3 NIV

 They’re everywhere.

 Stories of women from around the world who freely admit they seriously regret having kids.

 The first time I saw one of the headlines I was dubious. Surely, the author was overstating the extent of the issue to get clicks? However, research revealed this is indeed a real thing. I found dozens of articles on the subject and a plethora of chat rooms and support groups that serve as safe spaces for women who sincerely wish they never had kids.

 My first impulse was to judge.

 Not because women feel the way they feel. I learned long ago, feelings (unlike actions) are not something easily controlled. And as someone who has had some pretty inappropriate thoughts and feelings concerning all sorts of things and people I would never judge anyone for feeling a particular way.

For reals.

 That said, I struggled to withhold judgment when I saw these women vomiting up their feelings all over social media. Call me old-fashioned, but even in the age of compulsive over-sharing I still believe there are circumstances where it is thoroughly appropriate to shut our pie-holes. I still believe some feelings are best left bottled-up nice and tight in the presence of most people. There are some feelings that should only be shared in the privacy of a counselors office or in the presence of a very close friend. Regret over giving birth to a person who might see those regrets in print is one of those times.

Seriously.

 Because defending something or someone is far superior to judging something or someone I will do my best to lose any judgment I’m struggling with and attempt to make a defense for the cause of Motherhood (Matthew 7:12). I will not attempt to gaslight you by feeding you some insipid or overly spiritualized line about how fulfilling and blissful every moment of motherhood is. That is simply not true. Like most things in life mothering does have its moments of blissful fulfillment, but it’s far from easy and blissful, especially in the early years.

 As the Mother of four I know for a fact that while you’re in the middle of raising young children, parenting FEELS like nothing more than a lot of hard work, exhaustion and frustration punctuated with moments of agonizing self-doubt and fear. That being said, as someone who has raised kids to adulthood I can also tell you that mothering is worth the effort for four reasons:

 Mothering impacts the future like nothing else-

 To my eternal shame my children know very little about their great-Grandmother. She was an amazing woman who sadly, died long before they were born. I doubt any of them could tell you her first name (it was Areta). They certainly don’t know what she did for a living or any details concerning her likes or dislikes. However, I see a lot of her attitudes and values including fair-mindedness, generosity, and the value of hard work living on in my own kids. She sowed those ethics into me and I have done my level best to pass her legacy on to them. Most people a hundred years from now will not know or care about what you did for a living but they will know exactly what you valued in life because they will see those values living on in your children and grandchildren.

 Mothering is the best discipleship opportunity you are ever going to get-

 Most Christians long to make a spiritual impact on the future (Matthew 28:18-19). Parenting gives us the better part of two decades to impart spiritual truth into the hearts of our kids. If we go the extra mile and live what we say we believe we will make a significant spiritual impact on the lives of the kids we raise and they in turn will make a spiritual impact on future generations (Psalms 127:4-5) .

 Mothering has the power to make us better people-

 Mothering reveals in gory detail every single one of our shortcomings and less-than-healthy coping mechanisms. When our weaknesses are exposed we have two options, we can ignore reality or we can become better people. There is nothing quite like having a couple of kids watching to give us the incentive needed to work at becoming better people. (Romans 12:1-2, 2nd Corinthians 3:18)

 Parenting makes us dependent on God for wisdom and direction-

 Seriously. Anyone who has parented a child for more than an hour knows parenting kids is scary. Being scared causes a lot of people to look to God and we are all better people when we look to Him for insight and assistance.

 For decades now women have been force-fed the lie motherhood is a waste of their time, energy, and talents. That lie is spread in blogs, books and articles that promote a survivor approach to parenting. Social media is littered with snarky memes belittling motherhood with little adages like “Mommy needs vodka” and “don’t mind the mess the children are being a**holes”. With those attitudes so deeply rooted in our culture it’s not surprising that many women regret having kids. As Christians it is incumbent on us to take the long view of things and remember that we are not called to live comfortable, stress-free lives today, rather we are called to live our lives for the glory of God and future generations. If you’re a mom reading this you are doing a good thing that will make a difference.

God approves. I promise.

The True Value of a Woman

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

Blessed are those who fear the Lord, who find great delight in his commands~ Psalm 112:1

 Last weekend we spent the day preparing for out-of-town company. Our preparations consisted of frantically cleaning everything we never clean so we can trick people we rarely see into thinking we are much cleaner people than we actually are. It was a big job, and by dinnertime we were all exhausted and hungry. So my husband and I loaded the family up in the car and took them to dinner at a buffet.

 After a short wait we were seated next to a family with three children who all appeared to be under the age of six. I confess that was I less than excited to be seated next a family with little kids. After a long, hard day I wanted a little peace and quiet.

 My fears were baseless. The kids were adorable, polite and a delight to be around. But it was Mom who captured my attention. She was amazing. She serenely held the two-year-old on her lap, talking to him calmly about table manners and encouraging him to try new foods while still managing to keep an eye on the baby girl and calmly direct the older boy.

 Watching that remarkable young woman do what she no doubt does every day of the week, reminded me that Mothers are truly the unsung heroes of human history.

 If it were not for the sacrificial contributions of women throughout history, we would have no great civilizations, no novels would have been written, no masterpieces crafted and no righteous causes fought for. Precious few would have been inspired to attempt such things without a wise and loving Mother laying the right foundation and urging their children forward.

 The influence of a Mother is perhaps the most powerful force on earth. We have all been shaped for good or ill by the impact of our Mothers. Perhaps the most striking testimony of a Mother’s impact is how significantly we feel the loss when our mother is gone. For those of us who are fortunate enough to be mothers, we too have been shaped by the experience. Mothering is a powerful act that forever changes all involved.

 Christians universally agree that nurturing children is crucial. In recent years, Pastors have gone to great lengths to emphasize and celebrate the importance of Motherhood. This is a good thing. In a society that has devalued the act of mothering it is vitally important that Christian leaders encourage women as they nurture and train up the next generation.

 For women who are not Mothers, the second Sunday of May can be a painful one. In our eagerness to promote the importance of mothering, we can inadvertently send the message that Mothering is the only truly significant thing a woman can do. The message is a dangerous one that hurts all women, especially those without children and older women. Many feel their value is diminished once their children are grown and gone.

 As valuable as motherhood is, it is essential to remember that there is so much more to who we are as women than whom we parent. On this day that we rightfully set aside to celebrate the countless contributions Mothers make in this world, I want to remind women that motherhood is not the end of our journey towards biblical womanhood. It is simply a step that many of us take in the journey.

 God has called Christian women to be…

 Pursuers of wisdom and knowledge~ Proverbs 4:7, Proverbs 2:6

 Bold and courageous~ 1st Chronicles 28:20

 Competent to teach and pass on wisdom~ Proverbs 31:26, Titus 2:3-5

 Loving wives~ 1st Peter 3:1-8

 Mentors~ Titus 2:3-5

 Busy building up the Body of Christ~ Ephesians 4:11-13

 Constantly striving for betterment of others~ Proverbs 31: 8-9, Proverbs 31:20

 A woman’s ultimate power is found in her ability to influence. The quality of a woman’s influence will largely depend on the quality of her relationship with God. A woman who is seeking to be and do all that she has been called to be and do, regardless of the stage of life she finds herself, will become a powerful force for good in this world and a blessing to those whose life she touches.

 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised~ Proverbs 31:30