Tag: Getting Free

What is a Depraved Mind and how Does a Christian “go There”?

Lisa M. Price1 Comment

Furthermore, just as they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, so God gave them over to a depraved mind, so that they do what ought not to be done- Romans 1:28 NIV

 

Recently, I found myself attempting to encourage the close relative of a person deep in the weeds of an ugly addiction. The addict (a professed Christian) flatly refuses to repent of their sin or even entertain the notion their sin is a problem let alone a sin. To the dismay of the entire family the addict is willfully refusing to see the effect their sin is having on the lives of those they profess to love. Further complicating the whole messy mess, the addict is actively attempting to manipulate friends and family into believing their perception of the situation is faulty and the obvious is not reality.  

 Sigh.

 According to the Bible individuals become entangled in sinful patterns of behavior because they develop an evil and “depraved mind” (Romans 1:28, Hebrews 12:1). Deceitfulness, addiction and the refusal to deal with issues related to dishonesty and addiction are not the only indications of a corrupted and depraved mind. Nor is evil and depravity reserved for the worst of the worst: serial killers, sex traffickers and child molesters. Anyone who runs with reckless abandon into sinful behavior (pride, addiction, gossip, lying, covering sin, sexual depravity) and is determined to keep on keeping on is likely suffering from, or in the process, of developing a corrupt and depraved mind.

 The Bible does not exclude professed Christians from thinking or behaving in ways that ultimately lead to having a depraved mind. Like most issues in life, prevention is the best cure. Once wrong thinking leads to an entrenched pattern of immoral behavior it is difficult (but not impossible) to come back from it (Luke 18:27).

 It is critical we remember people, even unsaved people do not become evil or depraved in a day.  Developing a depraved mind is a process that begins with the willful decision to ignore a known truth about God. For an unbeliever this can be as simple as choosing to deny the existence of a Creator despite all the evidence that exists to the contrary (Romans 1:18-20). For Christians it ALWAYS begins with choosing to straight up ignore a clear New Testament command or teaching (Hebrews 12:25). The next step is choosing to disregard the guilt that goes along with choosing to ignore one’s conscience.  Then the person becomes bloated (metaphorically speaking) with pride. Pride convinces them they are above all the silly rules that apply to other Christians. They convince themselves they are special enough to sin without the consequences lesser humans inevitably suffer. Then they begin actively resisting accountability. Eventually, the sin morphs into the driving force in their lives. At this point the sin (addictive behavior) is just a symptom of a bigger sin: idolatry (1st John 5:21).

 Okay, so, a couple of things:

 First, when we see these behavior patterns in the lives of professed Christians we should never entertain the notion we are better than they are. That response to someone else’s sin indicates pride. Pride is a serious sin to be avoided at all costs. Once we become prideful we are more likely to get tangled-up in the same sins (Mark 8:15, 1st Corinthians 10:12).

Besides,

Pride is just super gross (Proverbs 18:13, 2nd Chronicles 26:16). Nor, should we ever help anyone escape the consequences of the choices they have made. The technical/psychological term for helping people avoid the natural consequences of their choices is codependence. The problem with codependence is that codependent people secretly think they know more than God does about what will actually help people. God knows everything about everything and He brings consequences into the lives of people because He is constantly working to mold Christians into the image of Jesus (2nd Corinthians 3:18, Colossians 3). No good ever comes from helping people avoid what God is using to make them healthier, wiser, and more like Jesus.

 Secondly, we should always be alert to sin in our own lives. The human heart is capable of an insane level of self-deception when it comes to sin (Jeremiah 17:9).  For that reason it is possible for Christians to be half-way to a depraved mind and not even know it. Therefore, it is critically important we take every opportunity to self-examine and evaluate our own moral and spiritual condition (2nd Corinthians 13:5).

 Finally, anytime we see another Christian struggling with sin our first response should always be to pray for them, not judge them. Once we’ve done that we need to beg God for the wisdom, grace and supernatural insight to know how to be Jesus to them in their time of need.   

 

What is the one sin that will halt Communication with God and Cause a Christian to Become Spiritually Useless?

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up. You will increase my honor and comfort me once more~ Psalm 71:20-21 NIV

 There are a few sins unique to a few seriously creepy individuals. Normal people might joke about murder. However, very few people actually kill people.  Even fewer people joke about cannibalism or human sacrifice. 

 Then there are the other sins.

 Those irksome little sins that sprout-up like weeds in a garden. The sins we all struggle with (1st Corinthians 10:13). There is simply no one in all of human history who has not grappled with lust, inappropriate anger, jealousy, hatred, selfish ambition and the inclination to gossip (Galatians 5:19-21, Colossians 3:5-6) at some point in their lives.

 Bitterness is another.

Scripture clearly instructs Christians to avoid becoming bitter and remaining bitter (Ephesians 4:31, Hebrews 12:15). That being said, most of us (if we’re honest) will admit to giving into the sin of bitterness at some point.  

Here’s the thing.

Most people do not become bitter without a valid reason. This inevitably leads people to feel justified and even righteous as they wallow around in the anger and resentment that ultimately leads to bitterness.  I am well-acquainted with the sin of bitterness. I learned first-hand over the course of several miserable and painfully unproductive years bitterness is one of those sins that hurts us far more than it hurts the people who have sinned against us.

 It is critical we understand God does not forbid bitterness because it is not a defensible, logical or understandable reaction to certain situations. Sometimes it’s all of those things. God forbids bitterness because bitterness gradually undoes every good thing God has done in our hearts, minds and spirits.  At the root of a bitter spirit is unforgiveness. Unforgiveness causes us to miss the grace of God and prevents us from experiencing the Christian life in all its beauty and fullness (Matthew 6:14-15, Hebrews 12:15, Luke 17:4).

 The paths that lead to bitterness are endless. Something as small and seemingly insignificant as being offended or ignored can cause a bitter root to develop in some more sensitive people. An unfaithful spouse, a two-faced friend, a tough childhood or ongoing, unrelenting injustice can cause bitterness in even the most thick-skinned of individuals.  

 Because bitterness is such a common sin and because it is something we are cautioned to avoid at all costs there are at least four things every Christian needs to understand about bitterness.

 Bitterness makes spiritual growth impossible-

 It does not matter how many sermons the bitter person hears (or preaches). Nor does it matter how much of the Bible a person can recite verbatim. There is something about the choice to remain bitter that makes it impossible for that person to apply the truth they are taught or are teaching to their own life. Any learning that does take place is typically just empty academic agreement (head knowledge) rather than a full emotional and intellectual adoption of truth we have understood and embraced (heart knowledge). Satan celebrates when Christians become bitter because bitterness keeps Christians stuck in a cycle of obtaining knowledge without actually growing (2nd Timothy3:7).

 Bitterness halts clear communication with God-

 Bitterness is a sin (Ephesians 4:31). Sin impedes communication with God. Repentance from sin is the only way to restore clear and unrestricted communication with God (2nd Chronicles 7:14, Daniel 9:1-19). Sadly, bitterness blinds us to the lack of communication we have with God, making it more difficult to get right Him.

 We have a responsibility to prevent our own bitterness-

 There will always be situations that come into our lives that have the potential to make us bitter. Some of those situations are one-hundred-percent unforeseeable and therefore entirely unavoidable. That being said, the author of the book of Hebrews tells the readers of the book to “see to it” that no “bitter root grows up”. The writer is instructing Christians to process and forgive offenses as quickly and completely as humanly possible.  Likewise, Christians should be very careful about voluntarily placing themselves in situations where bitterness is an obvious and foreseeable end result of said situation (Ephesians 5:15).

 Behaving in a way that causes others to become bitter is as sinful as bitterness-

 The New Testament clearly teaches a principal of mutual accountability when it comes to sin (Matthew 18:6). For example: Christians are clearly forbidden from committing adultery (Exodus 20:14, Mark 7:21). However, spouses are also cautioned against refusing each other sexually because doing so could tempt their spouse to commit adultery (1st Corinthians 7:1-5). Obviously, a lack of “IT” in a marriage does not make adultery acceptable to God (Hebrews 13:4). However, it does make the other partner accountable to God for their refusal to obey Scripture.  Similarly, each person is responsible before God for their own choice to become bitter. However, we have an obligation to live in such a way that we do not give people just cause to become bitter. If we don’t we will be accountable to God for our sinful, selfish or evil actions.

 Finally. There really is only one path to getting free from the sin of bitterness-

 We have to forgive.

 Seriously.  It’s that simple. We have to let go of the hurt and bitterness we are holding onto and let God be the judge and jury of the other person. 

 It’s His job (1st Samuel 24:12, Hebrews 4:13, 1st Peter 4:5) and it makes us free to do what He has called us to do. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Five Things to try When Life Feels Stuck-

Lisa M. Price1 Comment

I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world~ John 16:33 NIV

 There is little in life more challenging than a bad or frustrating situation that does not change in spite of our best efforts and fervent prayers. Sometimes the situation is financial. We need a job or a some sort of a financial miracle, or someone we love needs one or another. Other times the seemingly unchangeable situation is relational. We want to see health and healing in our marriage or a close relationship and despite our best efforts it just doesn’t happen. For Christians oftentimes the situation is spiritual, we want to see a breakthrough in someone we love that just doesn’t happen.

Sigh.

When these kinds of situations drag on for years at a time they can test our faith and cause us to doubt the goodness (and sometimes even the existence) of God.

 The following strategies are not magic bullets. Putting them into practice may or may not change your situation for the better (sorry). That said, we become what we do. Doing these things will help you put your mess in better perspective, empower you to handle the situation more effectively and enable you to grow in the midst of your trial.

 Stop resenting the situation- Job 5:2, Job 36:13

 Resentment is the worst. It literally poisons to our souls. It clouds our judgment, hinders our ability to problem solve and steals our joy. Furthermore, resentment is an emotional black hole that sucks up mental energy that would be better spent on problem solving. If resentment is allowed to fester and grow it will eventfully mutate into bitterness. Bitterness is the most destructive and defiling force on earth. It has the power to prevent us from doing anything good in this world (Ephesians 4:31, Hebrews 12:15). For those reasons (and at least a dozen others) it’s critical we deal with any resentment we may be harboring so we can move on to a healthier way of looking at and dealing with the present situation. Gratitude is the antidote to resentment. If resentment is an issue, spend some time in prayer thanking God for the good things you do have or the situations that are going well. It will melt away the resentment and refresh your soul.

 Learn what you need to learn from the mistakes that landed you in the situation but don’t live in the past- 2nd Corinthians 13:5

 No one is a bigger advocate of frequent self-examination than I am. Seriously. I believe with all my heart there is wisdom in scrutinizing past mistakes and poor choices. Understanding and owning our junk prevents us from making similar mistakes in the future. However, an unhealthy fixation on the past (ruminating on it constantly) is a pointless distraction that robs us of our ability to deal with the present productively. If you find yourself thinking constantly about past choices ask God to forgive you for those mistakes and help you to move past them with some healthy and wise choices in the present. Taking just one baby step in the right direction today will make tomorrow a little bit better.

 Control the one thing you do have absolute control over- Proverbs 16:22, Titus 2:11-12, 2nd Peter 1:3-10

 Oftentimes, when we feel stuck we also feel we have very little power to change the details of the situation or move things in a better direction. Our perception of the situation may or may not be accurate (see next point). That said, there really are times when the only thing we have any control over in a given situation is ourselves. We cannot control other people or the circumstances that come into our lives but we can control how we react and respond to the people and circumstances in our lives.

 Get advice from others and put at least some of it into action – Proverbs 12:1, Proverbs 12:15, Proverbs 13:10, Proverbs 15:22

 I know from my own experiences stuck people tend to develop tunnel vision when it comes to their situation. As a result we tend to think there is absolutely nothing that can be done to change or even improve our situation. Typically other people (friends, Pastors, counselors, coaches) can see options and alternatives that we cannot. This is why it’s absolutely critical we seek the counsel of others. However, simply asking for advice will do nothing if we don’t actually take the advice we are given and make the appropriate and necessary changes.

 Don’t give up- Galatians 6:9

 Ultimately, staying sane in a stuck situation is all about keeping things in perspective. Perspective is about far more than simply finding a way out of a bad situation. It’s about making a commitment before God to come out of the situation a better person than we were before we got in it. It’s about keeping our heart open and free from bitterness, so we can learn and grow in the midst of the situation.

 Keeping things in perspective enables us to help someone who is going through something similar in the future (2nd Corinthians 1:3-5). Keeping things in perspective and refusing to give up (no matter how tough it gets) empower us to come out of our difficult situation with a deeper faith, stronger character and more passionate love for God.

 And that’s what life is all about anyway.

Four Keys to Moving on From Past Regrets-

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment


Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death~ 2nd 7:10

 Regret is tough.

 There are a million different kinds of regret. Some regrets are no big deal in the grand scheme of life and eternity. Missed opportunities to do good or an occasional overindulgence (AKA taco night at my house) are lamentable for entirely different reasons. However, neither leads to the kind of grief that steals our joy and keeps us stuck in destructive emotional and spiritual patterns.

 Other regrets are obviously tougher simply because they are by their very nature trickier to reconcile in our hearts.

A missed opportunity to do good can typically be made-up at another time and the consequences of most indulgences can be remedied with a little extra exercise. Other choices more complicated. Perhaps we deeply regret getting married and/or divorced, our chosen career path, the choice to have (or not have) children, or a great big sinful decision that simply cannot be undone no matter how much we wish it could be. 

 Whatever the cause, regret can quickly become psychologically and spiritually debilitating. This is especially true if we allow ourselves to get stuck in the quagmire of “what if” and “if only” thinking. When this happens, we spend an inordinate amount of time wondering what life would look like if only we had made another decision or wishing we had taken another route in life.

 “What if” and “if only” thinking is a pointless waste of energy because it keeps us stuck in the past and focuses our energy in an introspective, navel gaze-y kind of way that will never actually change anything. To the best of my (admittedly limited) knowledge even God cannot change the past. Consequently, there is nothing to be gained by wishing we could do something that even the Omnipotent Maker of the Universe cannot (or chooses not) do.

 That said.

 Dealing with regret is about more than simply “getting over it” or “moving on”. I am convinced that God wants us to do more than just “get over” stuff. He wants to transform us into the image of Jesus Christ and sometimes God uses our deepest and most profound regrets in life to shape us into the people He wants us to be (Romans 8:28).

 There are four things we need to do anytime we are struggling with regret.

 The first is…

 Own what you need to own-

 Wise people own their mistakes because they know they will never grow past anything they refuse to take responsibility for (Psalm 32:5). If you have regrets concerning your marriage or how your kids turned out, do enough soul searching to figure out your part in the mess and own it. Don’t blame God, your parents, your spouse, society, or the church for the choices you made. No one can change what they refuse to acknowledge. Taking ownership is the first step to solving problems and living at peace with the past.

 Change what you can change-

 Taking responsibility frees us up to see what can and cannot be changed in any given situation. Sometimes even small changes in how we deal with people or circumstances can dramatically affect the outcome of the situation or the health of the relationship. If you don’t know what to do, read some Christian books, seek the advice of someone who has their life together or spend some time with a Christian counselor or pastor. Whatever you do, don’t give-up.  

Make right what needs to be made right-

 This means seeking forgiveness (Psalm 38:18, Hebrews 8:12). Every sin is ultimately a sin against God, so go to Him first and ask him to forgive you (He will). Then talk to the people you have hurt or wronged. If you were a crummy parent, spouse or friend be honest about your shortcomings and don’t blame others for your failures (Psalm 37:37, Hebrews 12:14). Seeking forgiveness from the people we hurt may or may not change how they feel about us but it does create an environment where God can bless and heal us.    

 Trust in the resurrection power of Jesus to do what we cannot do-

 Sadly, there are times in life when situations or relationships are simply broken beyond our ability to fix them. Once we’ve done what we can do, we need to trust God to do the impossible. The Bible is clear; if you are a believer in Jesus then the same spirit that raised Jesus from the dead is living in you and working on your behalf (Romans 8:11). The resurrection power of Jesus is not only about salvation. Over time (if we let it) God’s power infiltrates our lives and that power allows Him to do the impossible and fix the things that broken beyond fixing.

 

 

 

Finding Authentic Freedom-

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

For the Lord God is a sun and shield; The Lord gives grace and glory; No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly~ Psalm 84:11

 Content warning ahead:

 Our family drove to the Oregon coast this past weekend to connect with my four siblings for the first time since our Mother died eight-years-ago. The reunion was a blessing in every sense. However, it was also chaotic (in a good, loud, big-family kind of way) and a marathon of frenzied activity from start to finish.

 I left the beach emotionally gratified and seriously sleep deprived.

 The emotional hullabaloo and lack of sleep combined with too much time to think on the drive home left me feeling a bit navel-gaze-y. Evidently, one possible side effect of too much reflection is an overly emotional blog post. That little disclaimer out of the way, I do believe that I may have hit on some spiritual truth in the midst of at least some of my musings.

 For that reason I pray you’ll give it a read.

 As we passed through a really ugly part of Eastern Oregon it occurred to me that Christians seldom talk about the fall of mankind anymore. We should because our world and everything in it was dramatically distorted in the blink of an eye and not just spiritually. The fall altered how we relate to God, one another and even the natural world. Relationships that were once carefree and easy to navigate suddenly became complex and even adversarial.

 One of the results of living in a fallen world is that even the best stuff in life often has a distinctly sad edge to it.

 Reunions are happy but the separations that instigated the reunions never are. Parenthood is one of the most joyful events a person experience in this life; it is also one of the most difficult and befuddling. Roses have thorns; every profit has a loss built into it. Human innovation typically has at least one unintended and profoundly unpleasant consequence- and cake makes us fat.  

 This reality plays out in the spiritual realm as well.

 Spiritual growth and the blessings that go with it can only be achieved through an oftentimes-painful surrendering of our very selves. Forgiving others brings freedom but at the cost of forfeiting the basic right most of us feel we should have: the right to seek revenge on the jerks that hurt us. The fall even affected our feelings about right and wrong and our perception of reality. Wrong typically feels right and is usually the path of least resistance. Right is always the harder road to traverse.

 Even the grace of God has a sad side to it. Grace, that thing we rejoice in, venerate and write songs about is only necessary because of sin, sin ruined literally everything and sin breaks the heart of God.

 Gloomy, I know.

Grace is necessary because human beings blew it and were powerless to stop blowing it for even a single minute. God is relentlessly generous, so when it became appallingly obvious that there was no way any of us could be good on our own God stepped in. He sent His son to die for us and gave us the grace we needed.

 This realization was almost too much to bear. I was done in.

 Mostly because I have come to believe that our generation has a fundamental misunderstanding of the nature of grace and our lack of understanding is keeping us from becoming the people God has ordained us to be. We tend to view grace as nothing more than a massive bucket of forgiveness we can dip into anytime we have a sin that needs forgiving. We treat forgiveness like a magic concoction we apply to sin to make it acceptable, rather than an essential concession to our sinfulness.

 Thankfully, grace is much more than just a big bucket of forgiveness.

 Grace is power that frees us from the oppression of sin. The grace of God does more than simply forgive our transgressions. The grace of God gives us the power to overcome the sin nature that plagues us all (Titus 2:10-12). When we make the choice to live a holy life (Colossians 3:5-14, 1st Thessalonians 4:3-8, 2nd Peter 1:3-11) God dispenses the grace we need when we need it. That grace empowers us embrace the behaviors we need to embrace and let go of the behaviors we need to let go of so that we can be like Jesus.