Category: Life

The How-to of Keeping any Relationship Healthy, Happy and Drama-free-

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift- Matthew 5:23-24

 Relationships.

 They are without question both the blessing and the bane of human existence.

 When our closest relationships are healthy and thriving, life is good.  When a close relationship goes bad there is literally nothing more miserable and angst-inducing.  

 In our chaotic, sin-sick world messy, fragmented relationships are pretty much the new normal.

Sigh.

Nearly, half of marriages end in divorce, friendships end as quickly as they begin, business relationships no longer stand the test of time and churches routinely split over the stupidest stuff imaginable.

Our culture has been steeped in a it’s “all about me” mentality of relationship care for decades now. This has created an environment where it feels natural, normal and healthy to treat relationships like disposable commodities. It is not at all unusual even for Christians to write-off relationships as “toxic” and move on with little thought to the consequences of doing so. We have forsaken the principle found in Proverbs that tells us we should never forsake a friend or even the friend of a family member (Proverbs 27:10a). 

 The Bible clearly teaches Christians bear an extra measure of responsibility when it comes to the care, keeping and healing of relationships. We are reminded over and over again in Scripture that human relationships are not always easy but the difficulties involved in developing and maintaining healthy relationships make us better people (Proverbs 27:6, Proverbs 27:17) and bring joy to our lives (Proverbs 17:17, Proverbs 18:24).  Christians are directed to treat others the way they want to be treated and commanded to take the initiative when it comes to reconciling broken relationships (Matthew 7:12, Ephesians 4:32, Matthew 5:23-24, Luke 12:58).  Repairing damaged relationships and helping others to do the same is probably the most basic task Christians are called to in this life (2nd Corinthians 5:12-18).  The process begins with understanding and choosing to live out six principles:

 If something feels wrong in a relationship assume something IS wrong-

 Never trivialize or ignore the niggling sense you may have caused offense or alienated another person (Proverbs 18:19). When in doubt ask how the other person is feeling and/or modify your behavior. The earlier a damaged relationship is attended to the easier it is to repair.

 Do not short-circuit the recovery process-

 Anytime we jump to simply restoring a broken relationship without working through the issues that fractured the relationship in the first place we set in motion a series of events that will inevitably lead to even more brokenness and hurt. Problems need to be talked out, not glossed over if we want to see permanent recovery in the relationship and personal growth in ourselves. 

 Be willing to assume at least partial responsibility for any relationship fracture-  

 I truly loathe the adage: “perception is reality”. Mostly because if you really break it down it sounds like something a super crazy person would say. However, when it comes to hurt in relationships perception really is reality. It is critical we remember ALL human beings tend to be self-absorbed and blind to their own faults. For that reason, it is possible to hurt another person without knowing how we hurt them. Healthy, mature believers are always open to the idea that they may not understand how their words or actions have affected another person

 Accept the other person’s opinions regarding the situation-

 If someone lets you know the relationship has been broken or feels they were wronged by you it is not wise, kind or emotionally intelligent to write that person off as stupid, incorrect, easily hurt or just plain clueless. As Christians we owe it to God and people to find out why others feel the way they feel about situations that involve us—even when we truly believe we have done nothing wrong.  Not caring about the other persons perspective is both painfully narcissistic and grossly sinful.  The only time we are free from the obligation of exploring the other person’s perspective is if the individual flatly refuses to communicate with us.

 Be willing to let some things go-

 Our personal relationships matter to God partly because relationship health is a measure of our spiritual health and maturity level. It is also reasonable to say that from God’s perspective relationships are nearly always worth preserving (Proverbs 17:9). The key to achieving relationship health is a willingness to let some things go. Cruelty, gas lighting, unfaithfulness in marriage or flagrant disrespect for the other person is never okay. That said, most other issues can be worked through if both parties are willing to listen, change and forgive. 

Choose to view relationship troubles as opportunities for growth- 

 No normal, healthy or sane human being likes to have problems in their personal relationships. That said, truly mature people view all problems including relationship problems as an opportunity for growth rather than a hassle or a personal attack.

 The health of our relationships really and truly is the greatest measure of our maturity. It is also a powerful witness to unbelievers. A God who has the power to help a person have happy, healthy relationships is a God worth following. For that reason, alone Christians should do everything they can do to ensure their relationships are healthy and God honoring. 

Is it Possible to get the Blessings of Christianity Without all the Christian Morality?

Lisa M. Price1 Comment

 I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead- Philippians 3:10-11 NIV

Okay, so:

Following is a long story that I totally promise has a point: 

 Eleven years ago, a group of parents in our community became troubled by the lack of moral values among many young people. The group approached a local school-board concerning the issue. After a series of meetings, the Central Valley School District decided to go all-in on values education. A committee was formed and a curriculum was created that is still in use today. The curriculum systematically teaches values and positive character qualities to children in public schools beginning in kindergarten.The values chosen were respect, responsibility, citizenship, caring, fairness, honesty, diligence, trustworthiness, courage, integrity, generosity and gratitude. 

 For the record:

I have no idea how many of the parents on that committee were Christians, if any. At the time, our family lived in a neighboring district and I was not on the committee, nor was I friends with anyone who was on the committee. However, it did not escape my notice that every character trait on the list was in alignment with New Testament teachings and values. Furthermore, the definitions for each trait could have been written by a seasoned Sunday school teacher. For example, the definition chosen for citizenship was:

 Positively contributing to society and community as well as dutifully respecting authority and the law.

 Okay, so, that sounds a bit like a synopsis of Romans 13:1-7 to me, but who am I to say who or what motivated the writer of the definition?

 Any-hoo.

 Last week I noticed one of the schools near our home had the character trait of the month and its definition (caring) on the reader board. The sign reminded me of the movement eleven years ago to bring “values” back. 

 It immediately occurred to me that very little has changed for the better in our community over the course of the last decade. Most kids (and adults) still lack the values parents fought to have taught. Common courtesy is far less common now than it was then. Property crime is much higher than it was ten years ago. A school in our community recently experienced a school shooting and nearly every social problem under the sun has grown in the years since the program was implemented.  

So.

 Why, after all the tax dollars spent and all the hours put into teaching and training kids to embrace virtues have we seen so little improvement in the moral climate of our community? 

 It is not the fault of the brave parents who battled to bring values education into the schools. Those parents followed their consciences and worked their tails off to make a difference. That kind of moral courage is never wrong.  Nor, should the blame be laid at the feet of the school system. In a post-modern, post-values, post-Christian world some very courageous leaders took a risk and made a valiant attempt at standing up for some timeless truths. That kind of bravery should always be celebrated. 

 However.

For well over a century, individuals have wanted and, in some cases, even demanded values unique to Christianity be taught without all the pesky obedience to Jesus that accompanies genuine Christianity. Our culture wants nice people who practice Christian generosity in the event of a natural disaster or tragedy (Proverbs 11:25, 2nd Corinthians 9:6). Our society wants people to be kind, benevolent, compassionate and nice (Ephesians 4:32, Proverbs 11:17, Proverbs 14:21). Everyone regardless of religious belief wants people to be honest and upright as Christianity demands (Leviticus 19:11, Colossians 3:11). We want people in our culture to value  family as the Bible teaches (Exodus 20:14, Ephesians 6:1, Ephesians 6:4). These are all great values and pretty much everyone celebrates them openly. 

 However.

Almost no one wants to be burdened with any silly moral restrictions that might mess with our personal choices. We do not want God meddling in our sex lives, telling us how many genders there are or putting boundaries up on what we watch on television. We for sure do not want Christianity to inform our views concerning drug legalization or childrearing practices. God can mind His own dang business when it comes to our personal choices.

Thank you very much.

 The problem with this kind of thinking is that it will work for a generation, or two, perhaps even three. When Christianity is authentic it is powerful enough that Christian virtues (patience, kindness, temperance, generosity, self-discipline) will live on in succeeding generations who don’t really have a relationship with Jesus. However, sooner or later the veneer of Christianity will begin to  peel off society. When that happens the society begins to unravel and behave in a way that is a lot less Christian.

 This is where we’re living right now.

Western Civilization has been living in the shadow of the blessings that we have not earned (Deuteronomy 28, 1st Samuel 15:22, Psalm 128:1-3, John 14:23, 2nd John 1:6).  As that shadow shortens, our society is left with the dregs of a post-Christian reality: rudeness, disobedient children, corrupt politicians, lawlessness, sexual deviancy, broken families and random violence (Ezekiel 23:35, 2nd Timothy 3:1-5).

 We will never get our homes, churches, community or country back to a place of blessing by painting society with yet another whitewashing of Christian virtues. We need real authentic Christianity not just Christian virtues or values. Christians need to get back to the business of evangelism, repentance and making disciples (Matthew 28:18-20). It all starts with making sure our own heart is right with God and other people. Once that is done Christians need to get into their communities with God’s truth and love and tell the truth about what really makes a difference (Acts 16:31).

 

 

 

 

 

How did Judgment and Mistrust go Mainstream?

Lisa M. Price3 Comments

A word was secretly brought to me, my ears caught a whisper of it~ Job 4:12 NIV

Everyone with access to the Internet or a cable news channel knows about THE Peloton commercial. The one where the man gives his wife an insanely expensive exercise bike on Christmas morning. The woman (who does not look like see NEEDS an exercise bike) squeals with joy when she sees her gift. Then for some reason never fully explained she spends the following year recording EVERYTHING she does with the bike. The commercial ends with her practically weeping tears of joy as she describes how the Peloton has transformed her life.  

It stands to reason that the advertising professionals at Peloton were assuming viewers would see the ad as a sweet and uplifting story of a man loving his woman the way she wants to be loved. They were probably also hoping potential buyers would see the wife’s blissful reaction to the gift and be motivated to plunk down $2,245.00 for the bike plus $39.00 a month for the streaming service and iOS app. The streaming service and app are required throughout the first year of ownership.  

That’s not exactly how things worked out.

  Social media lit up like a Christmas tree with opinions over the ad. Men and women alike claimed the ad was “sexist”, “dystopian” and “cringe-worthy”.  One or two twitter users even suggested Peloton ought to be charged with sexual misconduct for producing the ad in the first place. Peloton stock took an ugly tumble.  

That was not all. 

People made peculiar and ugly judgments about the “couple” and their “marriage”. Most commenters simply wrote the husband off as a sexist, fat-shaming Neanderthal.  Others concocted complicated back stories for the couple. One woman claimed the wife seemed to be apologetic for her existence. Others proposed that she was suffering from a poor self-image. Many were alarmed that the woman seemed little too eager to lose weight for such a skinny girl (perhaps she has an eating disorder?). One person stated the woman was suffering from Stockholm syndrome. Almost every commenter feared she is a victim of spousal abuse. 

Personally, I found the comments about the commercial much more compelling than the actual commercial. I spent a good thirty minutes one evening sifting through them. As I shutdown my laptop for the night I was struck by a series of questions: 

Are these people crazy?

Do they not know that this is a commercial?

Are they confused about what commercials are for?

Why is everyone so upset by this?

Do they not have jobs or families to worry about?

Do they actually think these people are real?

Am I the only sane person left on earth?

What am I going to do if I am? 

It was a scary moment for me. 

Then I started thinking about the whole silly mess and I realized that the reaction to the Peloton commercial is actually indicative of one of the dumbest things we do in our culture. Someone will say a few words that appear innocent on the surface and someone else will read a whole bucket of subtext into the words and/or facial expressions of that person. Then they run with whatever their impressions are of the situation and next thing you know they have created a whole bizarre storyline out of a handful of words and a few facial expressions. 

Sadly, this madness is not consigned strictly to the realm of advertisements. This trend is driving the presidential impeachment hearings. The President said three little words: “do us a favor” and half the country has read a truckload of subtext into those words.  Everyone thinks they know what he “was really saying”, what his intentions were and what will happen if he is not impeached (the world will come to a fiery end).  Many have devised long, complicated backstories for the conversation. Some believe this is one of many secret conversations the president had with that particular leader.  Others think that rather than being concerned about irregularities in the 2016 election the President was so concerned with his 2020 competition that he wanted to “dig up dirt” on an old guy even most Dems admit they would only vote for out of desperation. 

Sigh. Sadly, the drama is beginning to borderline on collective mental illness.

The madness is not limited to suspicions regarding the President or pretend couples on television. This weirdly mistrustful, judgmental way of looking at the world is becoming incredibly common. Even Christians can get caught up in thinking they know what people “really mean” when they say something that appears innocent on the surface. When we share those suspicions with others our foolishness can split churches, ruin reputations and may even destroy a perfectly good marriage or friendship. 

It’s critical we remember that Christians are called to love others (Matthew 5:44, John 13:34). Love always chooses to believe the best in others (1st Corinthians 13:7). If we choose to live like the world we become just like the world. If we live like Jesus we become like Jesus and the world sees Jesus in us (1st John 2:16, Philippians 2:14-16).

How do you tell if a Church is Healthy?

Lisa M. Price1 Comment

 He is before all things, and in him all things hold together.  And he is the head of the body, the church. Colossians 1:17-18a NIV

I believe in the local church because healthy churches are the key to vibrant Christianity.

Healthy churches motivate believers towards maturity and provide an opportunity for individual Christians to make a meaningful contribution to their world. Healthy churches help people to understand and see Scripture from a richer perspective. A good church fosters an atmosphere where love, forgiveness, moral accountability and practical support become standard operating procedure. There is simply nothing better or more beneficial to the world than a healthy, life-giving church because a healthy church reflects all the attributes of Jesus. Conversely, there is little more spiritually and morally destructive than a truly sick church. Following are seven tell-tale indicators a church has systematic problems.  

Staff members tend to be absent outside of church services –

The Bible refers to a church as a body (1st Corinthians 12:12-27, Romans 12:3-5, Ephesians 4:1-6). One part of a body cannot avoid other parts of the body and still maintain overall health. This is especially true of members who hold leadership positions. Leaders lead through their example. In a church setting, leaders should be leading others towards participation in healthy community and into deeper relationships with other Christians. This cannot happen if the pastors and staff members are always the last to show up at events and the first to leave. 

The preaching is one-note- 

Church is supposed to be the place the Bible is explained and expounded on. In the hands of a skilled preacher or teacher the Bible will comfort, encourage and support the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18, Psalm 147:2-4).  However, the Bible is not all rainbows and lollipops.  The Bible describes itself as being sharper than a two-edged sword. If the Bible is taught properly it penetrates our souls and casts judgment on our bad behavior, sinful thoughts the rotten attitudes we harbor in our hearts (Hebrews 4:12). If the preaching in your church rarely or never leaves you feeling convicted about the things that need changing in your life, there is a problem. 

People are the means not the end- 

Healthy church leaders know that people are the reason we do church. People are not the means to some other end like building a big building, having a gazillion followers or being the church with a ton of campuses where all the cool people attend. People are the primary reason churches do what they do and if they are not then the leaders of that church have lost sight of the mission of the church. The church was established by God to promote spiritual growth, train individuals to do the work of ministry and reflect the heart of Jesus to the unsaved world (Luke 6:40, Matthew 28:19-20, Matthew 25:31-46, Ephesians 4:11-13, Galatians 2:20).  Anytime a church forgets the original point of church it’s a sick church.  

Sunday morning is all there is- 

There are 168 hours in a week. Most folks spend 52 of those hours sleeping, 40ish hours a week working, 30 hours watching television, 22 hours a week messing around on their phone and only one or two perhaps three measly hours of any given week immersed in any kind of spiritual activity. We need more spiritual food than that to process through all the spiritual and emotional junk we encounter in all those other activities in a given week (Hebrews 10:24-25). If a church does not routinely provide a means for people to connect outside of the Sunday morning service (small groups, Sunday school classes, midweek services, prayer groups) it’s not a healthy church (Acts 2:46-47). 

There is only one kind of people in the church- 

The early church was insanely diverse. The rich socialized freely with the poor. The old and the young were equally valued (1st Timothy 4:12, 1st Timothy 5:1-2). Slaves were sometimes the spiritual leaders of their masters and women and men worshiped together with individuals of all races (Colossians 3:11, Galatians 3:27-29).  A healthy church has a mixture of age groups, races and people from all sorts socio-economic circumstances. If a church is mostly millennials or mostly old people or mostly white people, or mostly black people or mostly rich people, something is probably not right. 

There is no replication- 

Healthy organisms reproduce (Acts 6:7). If a church isn’t planting other churches and the attendees are not leading people to Jesus, there is a problem.  

Finding a church is about more than simply finding a place that matches our particular doctrinal or musical preference. Nor is it about finding a place “we feel comfortable”. Finding a healthy life-giving church is about finding a place where we routinely feel spiritually uncomfortable and yet deeply loved and valued for who we are. When we find that we have a place to grow and bring others.

Lies we Believe about Forgiveness to our Detriment-

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free~ John 8:32 NIV

People believe all sorts of weird lies. 

Even really smart people believe all sorts of crazy stuff about relationships, what will make them happy, sex, money, the moon landing, God’s goodness, and what gender they are. 

Christians believe lies too.  

Most Christians believe in the goodness of God (at least on most days) and have the gender thing figured out. However, believers in Jesus are still predisposed to believe lies about every other topic under the sun. The most dangerous lies Christians believe are spiritual lies that contain a small seed of truth. Lies about forgiveness top that list. Following are six lies we believe about forgiveness that keep us from forgiving. 

You haven’t really forgiven unless you have also forgotten the offense–

Christians are commanded to forgive others just as God forgave them (Ephesians 4:32).  Fun fact: God does not simply forgive sins He actually forgets them. God says this of Himself in Isaiah 43:25…

 I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more.

That verse has sadly, created massive confusion in the minds of some. There are Christians who beat themselves up mercilessly because they remember the hurt they’ve experienced. Others have become bitter towards God because they believe He has set a ridiculously unattainable standard for forgiveness. Here’s the deal: unlike God, humans are limited. God can do whatever He chooses to do. Conversely, there are some things humans simply cannot do. Humans cannot create other humans from the dust of the earth and humans cannot forget the sins of other humans. It’s critical we remember two truths: God is not a jerk and He is fully aware of our limitations (He made us). God does not ask us to do more than we can do.  All He asks is that we let go of our “right” to seek revenge and trust Him to work out justice on our behalf.  

Authentic forgiveness always includes restoration of the relationship-

This is a filthy-rotten-lie the devil uses to keep good people from forgiving and moving on. After all, who in their right mind would choose to forgive their rapist or abuser if forgiving means they have to become friends with them? It truly is possible to fully forgive a person without building or rebuilding a relationship with them. Sometimes (not every time) forgiveness without reconciliation is the safest, wisest route to take.  Reconciliation is more complicated than forgiveness because reconciling with a stubbornly unrepentant sinner always leads to more hurt. Hurt leads to bitterness.  Hebrews 12:25 cautions Christians against placing themselves in situations that will likely lead to bitterness. No situation is more liable to produce bitterness than being repeatedly hurt by the same person. That being said, in cases where reconciliation can be achieved every effort should be made to attain that end. A skilled Christian counselor or a Pastor can be helpful in bringing about healthy reconciliation in relationships damaged by sin.  

Forgiveness is a “one and done”-

It’s not. Because humans are powerless to forget pain (see point one). Hurt has a way of returning usually about the time we think we have conquered it. If you have forgiven someone and feel the old feelings of bitterness return, take those feelings to God and ask Him to help you let go of the anger and resentment you feel. Ask until your heart changes (Matthew 7:7-8).  

Forgiving should feel good- 

Being free of hurt feels great. However, getting free from hurt is one of the most awful, painful and emotionally agonizing things a human being can experience. The good news is that God Himself will walk you through that awful process and you will come out the other side on a better, healthier path transformed into a new and freer person. 

We don’t really have to forgive- 

If God asked us to forgive for the sake of others this would be true, but it’s not, because He doesn’t. Christians are commanded to forgive (Matthew 6:14-15, Matthew 18:35, Mark 11:25) because forgiveness is the best thing for us as individuals. The other person is more-or-less irrelevant. Forgiveness frees us from the mental and spiritual distractions that comes from nurturing a spirit of bitterness.  When we harbor unforgiveness we become a shadow of what we might have been if we had been willing to fully obey the Lord.  

And finally,

We only have to forgive people who are truly sorry for what they did.

I Wish.

Only forgiving people who are truly sorry would certainly make forgiveness much easier and a lot more fun. Even a heathen can forgive someone who is sorry for what they’ve done.  Alas, God rarely asks His people to do the easy thing. Instead, He asks His people to the soul-building thing and forgiveness is one of those things.

Why do People Deconstruct Their Faith?

Lisa M. Price8 Comments

Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart- Jeremiah 29:12-13 NIV 

In recent years there has been a surge of those who have “deconstructed their faith” or to put in the old-fashioned vernacular: they renounced their faith in Jesus Christ. Some are influential Christians like Joshua Harris, Katy Perry and Marty Sampson. However, we have also seen an uptick in average Joes and Janes who have “deconstructed” or walked away from the faith.

Most of us know someone (or several someone’s) who were once actively involved in church who are now AWOL.  

Most lay the blame for this problem at the feet of church leaders.  I have personally pontificated in more than one blogpost about all the ways I believe the church and church leaders have failed the last two generations of church goers. However. In the interest of objectivity I believe it’s important to share the other side. It’s imperative we understand that with a few notable (and incredibly sad) exceptions’ churches have not driven people away. 

 People are choosing to leave.

Here’s the thing though:

Individuals who profess faith in Jesus and attend Church faithfully do not just wake up one day and just decide to stop. There is a process involved in departing the faith that starts with a hardening of the heart and ends with a defection from the faith (Hebrews 3:12-15). It begins with the adoption of attitudes and behaviors that open the door to apostasy. Christians should be on the lookout for those attitudes and behaviors in their own life and they should be ready to come alongside other Christians that are struggling with behaviors that can eventually lead to apostasy.  Those behaviors include: 

 You put a lot of faith in human leaders- 

Human leaders are, under the best of circumstances, a gift from God. A human leader who is fully obedient to Jesus can lead others into greater understanding of the faith, provide inspiration and give moral direction to other followers of Jesus. However, human leaders, even Christian leaders, are sinners just like all the other sinful humans out there. Humans lie, have affairs, steal, are sometimes bloated with pride and oftentimes get really important things hopelessly wrong. Wise Christians never put more faith in a human being, (no matter how wise or knowledgeable that human is) than they do Jesus. If your love for Jesus is dependent on the virtue of a human leader. I guarantee your love for God will grow cold sooner or later (Matthew 24:11-12). Human leaders always fail us at some point.

You don’t pray-

According to surveys most Christians (over half) spend less than three minutes a day in prayer. That means most Christians pray over their meals (maybe) and when they find themselves in dire straights.  As Christians have prayed less, more are leaving the faith (Matthew 26:41). There is, without question a correlation and a causation between these two issues (Jude 20-21). 

You never really committed to a local church-

Church attendance cannot and will not save anyone from their sin (only Jesus can do that). That said, a Christian who chooses not to connect in a local church will probably at some point be tempted to leave Christianity altogether. This is because church is where Christians build relationships and acquire the accountability necessary to get them through seasons of temptation and difficulty.   (Proverbs 27:17). 

You have not done the work necessary to transform your thinking- 

Because we are all sinners from the moment we enter this world, wrong thinking is an integral part of our operating systems. One of the primary tasks of a new Christian is to begin the process of renewing their mind and changing their thinking about just about every subject under the sun (Romans 12:2, 1stCorinthians 14:20, 2nd Peter 3:1). If your attitudes about sex, relationships, politics and work haven’t changed since you became a Christian it’s possible you are not a Christian or you are in danger of falling away from Christianity (Hebrews 5:11-12).  

You love secular advice- 

Christians are called to live life by a different set of rules and values than the rest of the world. Non-Christians and immature believers know very little, if anything about how Christians are called to live (Matthew 5:43-48, Romans 12:12-14, Colossians 3:5-6). When we take most of our counsel or direction from those who are ignorant of Christian values (secular talk show hosts, women’s magazines, non-Christian counselors) or those who have recently converted to Christianity our thinking will remain stuck in a secular/worldly mindset. No one stuck in a secular mindset is capable of bringing glory to God or bringing anyone else into the Kingdom. (Colossians 3:1-3).  

You love the world a little too much- 

We “love the world” when we take our cues about how to live, love and function from the world’s system rather than from the Bible (John 2:15, Romans 12:2). Loving the world means the values of the world are influencing us and we are not influencing the people God has put around us.  

God loves every human on earth with an absurd and crazy passion. However, people have a responsibility to respond to God’s love in humble faith, obedience and with a heart that is determined to persevere in the faith. It’s imperative Christians remember that no one will get a free pass from Jesus on judgment Day because the church disappointed them (Revelation 20:11-15)

The Two Greatest Heresies (Theological Errors) Common to our Time-

Lisa M. Price1 Comment

Be careful to live properly among your unbelieving neighbors. Then even if they accuse you of doing wrong, they will see your honorable behavior, and they will give honor to God when he judges the world~ 1st Peter 2:12 NLT 

The word heresy is simply a fancy-pants theological term for the act of departing from a pattern of sound biblical teaching (1st Timothy 6:20-21, 2nd Timothy 1:13, 2nd Timothy 4:3). 

Sometimes heresy takes the form of some seriously insane theories about God. 

 At one point there was a fairly large group of Christians who believed Jesus was just a human being who was formally adopted by God at his conception. Once the adoption was “finalized” he developed a divine (God) nature while growing in Mary’s body (Adoptionism). Other early believers were convinced Jesus was a phantom who didn’t leave footprints when He walked rather than a flesh and blood person (Gnosticism). For nearly a thousand years some “Christians” believed people are born without a sin nature and are capable of living a holy life apart from Jesus and the regeneration of the Holy Spirit (Pelagianism).  

Most heresies are not crazy-pants lies about God or obvious misinterpretations of Scripture. Most heresies are more like tiny kernels of actual theological truth wrapped-up in a bunch of half-truths and odd little errors.  Two such heresies are deeply rooted in our contemporary Christian culture. The first is legalism. Legalists believe they can earn God’s favor by doing all the right things and obeying all the right rules. 

God really does care about our behavior (more on that later). However, even the best-behaved person in the world cannot save themselves from their own sin (Ephesians 2:8, 2nd Timothy 1:9, Hebrews 10:39). Legalism sidetracks Christians from relationship with Christ by placing the emphasis on what we can do for ourselves rather on what Jesus did for us. This eliminates the element of of worship and gratitude from Christianity. Legalism also falsely paints God as demanding, callous and impossible to please. This leads some legalists to feel discouraged and resentful towards God. This can lead to hopelessness and eventually even a departure from the faith.

On the other end of the doctrinal spectrum is a perversion of grace that teaches there are no rules for Christians. These folks believe once a person is saved there is nothing they can do or not do to offend God or break relationship with Him. Christians who have intentionally or unintentionally adopted this view do not worry seriously about the effects of sin. They simply do not think about what deliberate, premeditated sin will do to their relationship with God. Adherents to this view are growing in number and having an enormous impact on the greater Christian culture. 

The truth is that our behavior does matter, not because good behavior saves us, or because “being good” makes God like us better. Correct behavior and following the rules matter for four reasons:

Righteous behavior protects us from moral failure and the pain that accompanies a moral blowout– 

Ephesians 6:14 instructs Christians in a metaphorical sense to put on the “breastplate of righteousness”.  The primary purpose of a breastplate in Roman body armor was to protect the soldier’s heart from injury. In Proverbs 4:23 the writer instructs readers to “guard your heart because everything you do flows from it”. Behaving in a way that is righteous (avoiding sin and questionable behavior) protects us from all sorts of pitfalls, wrong thinking and potential moral disasters. For example, going out of your way to avoid pornography protects against addiction, the sin of lust and at least a dozen other really ugly sins. Avoiding those who gossip ensures that you will not become a slanderer (Psalm 15:1-3).  

When Christians behave virtuously non-Christians have the opportunity to experience something the Bible calls conviction-

Perhaps the most critical reason to avoid sin and to behave righteously is because when we do, the people around us have a model of good behavior to follow. Sometimes our good behavior even leads sinners to feel guilt or conviction over their bad behavior (1st Peter 3:13-16). Conviction often leads to repentance. Repentance leads to salvation. Being a part of someone else’s salvation experience is a huge blessing so huge it is literally without measure (James 5;19-20, Jude 22)

Christians are commanded to avoid certain behaviors and sins-

The New Testament gives a series of “sin lists” addressed to Christians (Mark 7:21-22, 1st Corinthians 5:10-11, 1st Corinthians 6:9-11, 1st Timothy 1:8-11, Colossians 3:5-8, Galatians 5:19-21). These lists are predicated with or followed by the caution that people who routinely practice the sins listed will not “inherit the kingdom of God”.  In my view it is reasonable to question the salvation of any “Christian” who chooses not to take those warnings to heart. 

Bad behavior causes Christians to lose their moral authority-  

There was a time in the not-so-distant past when most people (saved or unsaved) looked to the church and Christians for moral direction and spiritual guidance. However, allegations of fraud, sex abuse scandals, infidelity and wholesale hypocrisy amongst clergy and laypeople alike have stripped the church and its people of any moral authority we once had. Now our culture is swimming in moral chaos and thanks to the sinful antics of Christians over the last forty years no one is looking to the one source that truly has the answers to our problems: the church. 

God loves humanity so much that He sent His Son, Jesus, to save people from their sin (John 3:16). His love doesn’t end there though. God also loved us enough to give us moral boundaries to keep us from going off the rails after we come to know Jesus. When we don’t stay within the boundaries God gave us we create disaster for ourselves and run the risk of leading others astray.

What are the Four Things Christians Should Never Ever Settle for?

Lisa M. Price3 Comments

Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom- Psalm 90:12 NIV

People are weird. 

Human beings are wired in such a way they will fight to the death for things they don’t really want, need, or care anything about but then settle for things that are less than what is best for everyone involved without so much as a single word of resistance.  

Seriously.

Even many of God’s people will happily settle for less than what God really wants us to have. We settle for things that look and feel “good enough”. Settling for less than what God has for us limits our personal growth and chokes our ability to be a force for good in this world. Evil is accelerating at an alarming pace. (2nd Timothy 3:1-3, 2nd Timothy 4:3, 2nd Peter 3:3-4). If we want to have an impact in these times we cannot afford to settle for anything less than God’s best.

Following are four things that will eventually ruin us if we settle for them:

Minimal influence-

Christians are redeemed for the sole purpose of influencing others (Matthew 5:14-16) and making a difference in this world (Ephesians 2:10). We minimize our ability to influence when we choose to blend in and take on the attitudes and behaviors of our culture. Taking on attitudes of worldliness, selfishness and unforgiveness will cause Christians to become powerless to effect change and spiritually useless (Matthew 5:13).

Makeovers–

Humans are extraordinarily perceptive when comes to sensing social patterns. No one really wants to be branded as strange, so we carefully monitor and regulate our public behavior. Christians are pros at this. The minute we get saved we take a look around at what other Christians are doing or not doing and dutifully fall in line. If none of the other Christians we know are dropping F-bombs we stop dropping F-bombs. If none of the other Christians are drinking beer we steer clear of beer. If other Christians are going to Bible study, we get our butts to a Bible study.  We alter our external behavior to fit into whatever Christian culture we are a part of. None of these things are bad things. However, sometimes we do this without changing the attitudes of our heart (Romans 12:2).  Regulating behavior is not necessarily wrong or sinful. There are times when it is even healthy (Proverbs 16:32). However, simply copycatting good behavior falls painfully short of God’s will for our lives. God wants more for His people than wrong thinking covered-up with right behavior.  He wants to transform our thinking so that our behavior falls in line with what the Bible says rather than simply settling for behavior that “appears Christian” on the surface. Transformation cannot happen without effort on our part. We have to want it, pray for it and work our tails off to get it (Philippians 2:12, Ephesians 4:17-32). 

Being smart- 

Everybody understands what it means to be smart. Smart people can read, write and solve tricky mathematical equations. Smart people speak well and they know how to get things done. Smart is good. Wisdom is better (Proverbs 2:12-16). Wisdom empowers people to think like God thinks and to see problems, situations and people from His perspective (James 3:17). Wisdom enables people to look at every side of an issue and think through all the conceivable outcomes of issues. Wisdom enables people to know good advice when they hear it and teaches them to tactfully ignore bad counsel (Proverbs 13:10) Wise people know when to give a little so they can get a lot and they know when they should go to war to eventually achieve peace. Wisdom is gift. God bestows wisdom on those humble enough to ask for it (2nd Chronicles 1:7-12, Proverbs 1:7, Proverbs 2:6, James 1:5). 

 Human approval–  

Humans universally hunger for approval and acceptance. Unfortunately, sometimes that aspect of our human nature bumps up against God’s will for our lives. Anytime a Christian chooses being liked over speaking against sin or speaking up for God we settle for less than the best, break the heart of God and limit our usefulness for the Kingdom. 

The world is getting darker by the day and the darkness is not going anywhere anytime soon (Matthew 24:7-13). In a world where sin is celebrated and there is a constant danger biblical Christianity will be criminalized. It is imperative God’s people do not settle for anything less than being the world changers we are called to be. 

Satan’s Latest Diary Entry-

Lisa M. Price1 Comment

You live in the midst of deception; in their deceit they refuse to acknowledge me,” declares the Lord- Jeremiah 9:6 NIV

Dear Diary, 

Life is perfectly splendid here in hell. 

This morning, I received month-end reports from all department heads. My scheme to distract humans from the truth of God and completely destroy them in the process is exceeding even my wildest hopes and expectations.

 Western civilization has bought into the absurd notion sexual pleasure is the key to happiness and self-actualization.  I have managed to get half the human population so fixated on their own genitals that they are incapable of thinking of little else. The pornography industry has been incredibly useful to me in this area. A few decades back lobbyists for the industry convinced the courts that pornography is a harmless form of “free speech”. Now pornography is available on every smartphone in the land. Generation Z has been exposed to so much pornography that many of them would rather watch other people have sex than actually have sex. The ones that do have sex tend to have some pretty creepy ideas about the whole thing.  Thanks to my efforts and the help of the porn industry many humans will never be capable of having normal, healthy relationships. 

WINNING!

I love a good lie and I hit on a winner a few years back. I actually persuaded educators, parents and activists that the science of biology is an irrelevant “social construct”. Ridiculous humans now “choose their own gender”. The concept is so obviously preposterous I secretly questioned whether or not I could pull it off. Nevertheless, I am pleased to report that gender confusion is “a thing”. Schools teach children there are dozens of genders to choose from. The results have been magnificent. It is now trendy for children in elementary school to” identify” as “transgender” or “gender fluid”.  I am most pleased with how I convinced some parents they should allow their children to “transition”. “Enlightened” parents give doctors (who ought to know better) the go-ahead to pump their kids full of powerful hormone blockers and perform irreversible surgeries on their beloved children. I love it when kids transition. It destroys their natural sex drive and ensures their developing bodies will be mutilated beyond repair. It also guarantees that kids will never be capable of producing children of their own.  I am tremendously eager for those children reach adulthood. They will soon recognize all that was stolen from them thanks to their parent’s desire to appear openminded to their progressive peers. I predict those kids will someday loathe their own parents.  I amaze myself with my own ingenuity. I really am that smart. Seriously. 

But, I digress. 

 Thanks to fake news and self-absorption I haven’t seen so much social turmoil and class envy since the days of the French Revolution (good times).  Americans have the highest standard of living of any country on earth and yet all they do is demonstrate and demand free stuff. It looks as if socialism might be taking root. I adore socialism.  What’s not to love about a system motivated entirely by envy that leads free people to hand their God-given rights over to godless bureaucrats who crave power and control? All I need is a few more of those idiots in power and all my dreams for that stupid country will finally come true. Thanks to media lies they are hovering on the brink of civil war. I LOVE civil war. It’s s just so magnificently bloody and destructive. Christians in America send out more missionaries than any other nation on earth. War will bring that nonsense to a screeching halt and there will be more souls in hell. I see nothing but potential in this situation.

 LOVE IT.  

I was a wee bit disappointed to discover that the abortion rate is down a bit in the U.S.  All is not lost. I am on it.  I have influenced a number of celebrities to glamorize and celebrate their own abortions. Young girls read those glowing testimonials and want to be like the women they admire.  The abortion rate should be rebounding any day now. 

The church has aided me greatly in my efforts in recent years. I have nothing but gratitude towards those stupid but well-meaning Christians who bought my lie that talking about sin will keep the church from reaching the lost. Those fools go on and on about the love of God without ever realizing that it is only when people understand their own depravity that they seek God and are healed. Then there are the Christians I convinced that God doesn’t care about how they live. They live exactly like their unsaved neighbors and coworkers. Literally no one is being drawn to Jesus by those people.

Satan   

How do we Forgive the Jerks who Hurt Us?

Lisa M. Price1 Comment

If you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses- Matthew 6:14-15 NKJV

Let’s be real. 

Hard things are hard and God asks His kids to do a lot of legitimately hard things.

Jesus’ followers are called to love the unlovable, exercise self-control in the most unjust of circumstances and do good things to and for those who mistreat them (Luke 6:27 12:17-19, 1st Peter 3:17, Matthew 5:44). 

Dang.

However. Without question the hardest of all the hard things God’s people are called to do is to forgive. The New Testament passages that mandate total forgiveness are insanely comprehensive and leave no legitimate wiggle-room for compromise on the subject (Matthew 18:21-35, Mark 11:25, Colossians 3:13, 1st Peter 2:18-21). These requirements go so far as to teach that our being forgiven by God hinges on our willingness to forgive others. 

Yikes. 

Furthermore, Hebrews 12:15 tells us if unforgiveness is allowed to harden into bitterness the bitterness will not just defile (taint, corrupt, ruin) the bitter person but the people they love as well. 

Sigh. 

Over the course of the last fifteen years or so I have been “blessed” with several “opportunities” to forgive people who legitimately did not deserve to be forgiven. These were not small slights like having my feelings hurt, being overlooked in a social situation or being ignored by someone I felt should care about me. Each experience was extremely personal and painful.  To my knowledge, none of the people I had to forgive were actually sorry for anything they did. None of them ever apologized or even admitted any kind of wrongdoing. I will not be spilling the tea on the details. All anyone really needs to know is that all those situations were incredibly painful and ultimately demanded more of me than I honestly thought I was capable of giving at the time. 

Through those situations I learned there are steps that must be followed for the process of forgiveness to work itself out. These things don’t need to be done in a particular order. However, if any parts of the process are skipped or glossed over the forgiveness will be incomplete and our feelings towards the person who hurt us will harden into bitterness. 

 Following are the steps to forgiving others:

Recognize that forgiveness is a process rather than an event- 

Forgiving really big offenses is rarely, if ever, a one and done. Forgiveness begins with the choice to forgive. However, that choice must be followed by a commitment to do the work necessary to truly move on from the hurt. The length of time it takes to work through the process depends on many things including the level of hurt involved and the maturity of the person who was hurt. 

Ask God to help you-

Any reasonably mature adult can forgive a social slight or a minor offense easily.  However, there are some hurts and offenses so grievous that even the most spiritually mature people cannot forgive them without God’s help and guidance.  

Allow yourself to feel the impact of the hurt-

Anytime I hear someone who has just experienced a hurt at the hands of an evil person say “I forgive them”. My heart breaks for that person because I know they aren’t Jesus and Jesus is the only person who ever lived who is truly capable of forgiving an act of evil without first sorting through their feelings about the situation (Luke 23:34). Forgiveness is hard because it means surrendering the right we all feel we have to hold people accountable for sinning against us. Feeling the full, ugly impact of a hurt is excruciatingly painful. Therefore, it is tempting to simply utter the words “I forgive” without counting the cost and really working through how we feel about the person who hurt us. If we skip this step we will likely find that the feelings of forgiveness do not last long. Another possible consequence of skipping or glossing over this step is turning to substances (drugs, alcohol, food) to keep the bad feelings at bay.    All that being said, it is critical that we don’t get stuck in feeling the pain because if we do bitterness is inevitable. 

Find a person to help you process- 

God designed the human race in such a way that people need people (Genesis 2:18). Christians are commanded to comfort the hurting and to grieve with those who mourn (2nd Corinthians 1:3-5, 1st Thessalonians 2:11-12, Romans 12:15). No one needs comfort more or is grieving harder than someone who is processing a huge injustice.  If you are hurting find a Christian counselor, Pastor or mature Christian friend who can walk you through the process. If you happen to be in a good place right now commit yourself to being the person who helps someone when they need comfort (Matthew 5:9, James 3:18). 

Pray daily for the person who hurt you- 

You absolutely have to pray God blesses the person who hurt you. This one sucks in the worst way imaginable but it is also probably the most important. Thankfully you are not required to pray they will be blessed with a million dollars or their dream job. Instead, ask God to bless them with healthy self-awareness so they will begin to understand how their actions are affecting the people they interact with.  Ask God to put people and situations in their lives to help them become more self-aware and caring. Pray He will do whatever needs to be done in their lives for them to grow into the best version of themselves possible (Luke 6:28). Keep praying those prayers until you feel freed from any bitterness you feel towards the person who hurt you. 

Forgiveness is never easy.

That said, forgiveness is worth all the pain and trouble involved because the alternative is mental, emotional and spiritual bondage. Unforgiveness keeps us emotionally stuck, making it impossible to grow, change and be transformed into the image of Jesus.  Authentic forgiveness frees us from the mental bondage of thinking about the person who hurt us all the time. This frees us up to focus on the things that will empower us to become the people God wants us to be and that kind of freedom is worth any trouble and pain it takes to get there (2nd Corinthians 3:18).