Category: Forgiveness

How We Cultivate a Good Heart-

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

 As water reflects the face, so one’s life reflects the heart– Proverbs 27:19 NIV

The heart. It’s the biggest of deals. 

the Bible teaches that the human “heart” is more than just an organ in our body. It is who we really are. It is the source of all our thoughts, feelings, actions and words (Proverbs 4:27, James 3:14). Because it is the source of so many critical aspects of our character, it is ultimately the determiner of our path in life. If our heart is good and pure, our choices and actions will be (for the most part) honoring to God, good for us and life-giving to those we love. Conversely, those with a sinful, prideful, unbelieving or hard heart are incapable of submitting their lives to God in a meaningful way, no matter how much they SAY they want to do good and honor God (1st Samuel 24:13, Matthew 15:8, Matthew 15:17-19, Proverbs 21:4, Proverbs 19:3). 

The Bible teaches we have a measure of control over the spiritual state of our own heart and the choices we make (Psalm 73:1, Matthew 5:8, 1st Timothy 1:5, 2nd Timothy 2:22, Hebrews 10:22). This is in direct contrast to the worldly belief that our choices (good or bad) are due to how we have been treated or are a result of trauma we have experienced. The Bible holds adults accountable for the choices they make because those choices are a direct result of the state of their heart, not the fault of other people. Wise Christians monitor, protect and deal with the condition of their heart because they understand it is one of the primary tasks of the spiritual growth process (Luke 21:34, Philippians 4:6-8). If one fails at this critical task they will be unable to live the Christian life with any degree of real success.

Sigh. 

No one wants that.

We cultivate a heart that pleases God by making a commitment to the following five action steps.

Taking our spiritual temperature often-  

Our life is full of indicators that reveal the state of our heart. Ww ought to ask ourselves the following questions on a regular basis: What is my go-to for entertainment? Is it full of sex, violence and darkness? Or is it pretty clean? Do I have a problem with lust? What kind of language do I use? Is it encouraging and spiritual or is it full of innuendos and cursing?  Do I routinely pray, read the Bible and attend church?  How and where do I spend my money? If, after asking ourselves these questions we discover our lives are mostly focused on the worldly, carnal and selfish, it is incumbent on us to change direction (Mark 7:21, Luke 6:44-45, Ephesians 5:3-5, 2nd Corinthians 9:6-7). Pronto. 

Choosing to walk in the righteousness of Jesus daily-  

In Ephesians 6:14 the apostle Paul tells his readers to put on the “breastplate of righteousness”. The purpose of a “breastplate” in biblical times was to protect the heart from damage. Paul wants his readers to understand that righteous attitudes and behavior protect our hearts from spiritual damage and moral defilement. There is good and bad news here. The bad news is that none of us (saved or unsaved) have any righteousness of our own. Our greatest acts of righteousness and goodness are like filthy rags compared to the righteousness and goodness of God (Isaiah 64:6). The good news is that Christians do have access to all of Jesus’ righteousness. When we put on righteousness of Jesus we are doing two things, first we are asking Jesus to empower us to walk in HIS righteousness. Second, we are reminding ourselves to act like Jesus instead of our own sinful, rotten, self-involved selves. When we choose to walk in the righteousness of Jesus our hearts are safeguarded from defilement and sin (Psalm 24:4). That’s why it’s called a breastplate of righteousness. 

Maintaining emotional distance from things and people that do not share our beliefs- 

It is perfectly okay to participate in secular activities and have friendly relationships with non-Christians (Matthew 9:9-12). It is impossible to impact the world for Jesus without relationships with non-Christian people. However, it is spiritually unwise to make our greatest emotional investments in people and activities that do not enrich our faith (1st Corinthians 15:33, 1st John 4:5, James 4:4). Anytime we habitually choose the secular over the sacred we run the very real risk of turning our hearts away from the sacred. When that happens loving the world becomes our new normal and our hearts become hard toward the things of God (1st John 2:15-17). 

Feeding our minds and souls good things- 

A healthy soul and a pure heart don’t just happen. We must go after them persistently (Proverbs 2:1-11, Psalm 19:7-14). Intentionality about reading the Bible, spending time with Christian friends, prayer and listening to Christian music goes a long way towards cultivating a healthy soul and a pure heart (James 1:27, Psalm 119:105, Acts 2:42, Matthew 26:41). 

And finally:

Life is full of events, people and situations that can weigh our hearts down with unresolved anger, unforgiveness and just plain old spiritual weariness (2nd Timothy 3:12, 1st Thessalonians 3:3).  If we are not extremely watchful and wise, Satan will use these times to plant seeds of bitterness, resentment and cynicism.  Our responsibility during these painful seasons is to rest in the Lord, trust His plan and be obedient to the things we do understand (Romans 15:13, Ephesians 4:26-27, Matthew 6:15, Proverbs 3:5-6, James 1:1-2). When we do that we have a good heart and live a life that pleases, honors and glorifies God (Matthew 5:8, Matthew 25:23). 

It doesn’t get any better than that. 

How to Abuse, Misuse and/or Cheapen Grace-

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

Do to others as you would have them do to you- Luke 6:31 NIV

Grace is a big stinking deal. Grace is central to the Christian faith and vital to all Christian theology. Without the doctrine of grace there is literally no Christianity.

Seriously.

Grace is the word we use to describe God’s love for human beings and His mercy towards their sin (Ephesians 1:3-8, Ephesians 2:1-5). Grace is sometimes defined as “God’s unmerited favor”. There is nothing wrong with defining grace as favor. However, grace is much more than simple favor, kindness or approval. God’s grace is best understood by what it has done for us. God manifested His grace in the life, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Jesus died in the place of all humans so no human would be forced to pay the penalty (eternal separation from God) for their own sin.  Jesus got death so humans can, if they so choose, have grace (forgiveness, leniency, mercy) for their sins. God gifts grace to human beings who put their faith and trust in Jesus Christ and repent or turn away from their sins (Matthew 3:8, Acts 3:19, Acts 17:24-31). No one can earn grace through good works (Galatians 5:4). People just aren’t good enough for that (Romans 3:23). Grace is a gift God gives those who choose faith in Jesus (Ephesians 2:8-9, Galatians 2:21, Hebrews 11:6).  

It has become a common feature of our Christian vernacular to say we ought to “give grace” or be “given grace”. This simply means we think someone should give or be given a break (leniency) for a sin or not be judged too harshly for something.  There is nothing wrong with looking at grace from this perspective. Grace is not just something we get. Grace is something we give to others. Once a sinful human has experienced the joy and peace that comes from being forgiven by God that sinful human is expected to turn around and extend the same favor to others and forgive like God forgives (Matthew 6:12-15).

All the wonders of grace aside, like all good things in life, the whole concept of grace can and sometimes is abused. We can misuse grace. We can cheapen grace. When grace is abused, cheapened or misunderstood Christianity becomes confusing to non-Christians and the Holy Spirit is grieved (Ephesians 4:30). Following are four common ways grace and be abused, exploited or misapplied: 

We abuse grace when we do not understand or care about the price paid for grace- 

Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote an entire book condemning the whole notion of “cheap grace”. We cheapen grace when we choose to live as if God puts no boundaries around Christian behavior (Ephesians 5:1-7, Hebrews 12:14, 2ndCorinthians 7:1).  Cheap grace is the belief people should be able to sin all they want as willfully as they please and then just assume grace will cover their premeditated, willful sin. This kind of thinking (whether conscience or subconscious) is a form of spiritual entitlement that clearly shows the person does not understand the high price that was paid for their sin and as a result, they do not value or understand grace (Luke 22-23).   

We abuse grace when we demand it from others as if it is owed to us-

Everyone wants to be extended grace (leniency for wrong behavior). However, any time a person demands grace from another there is a pretty good chance they are demanding it precisely because they have in some way violated the command to “do unto others as you would have them do unto you” (Luke 6:31) or as James puts it: they have violated the “royal law of love” (Mark 12:31, James 2:8). It is categorically not okay for a Christian to have an affair, abuse their kids, slander someone or break any of the ten commandments and then loudly and proudly play the “you owe me grace” card. That is a clear violation of the law of love and an abuse of grace. 

We abuse grace when we stop being shocked by it-

The whole concept of grace should amaze us. Seriously. It should knock our socks off and blow our minds. The whole notion God (or anyone else) would simply let something as serious as sin go without some sort of punishment or at the very least a sternly worded lecture is stunning and beautiful and mind blowing. When we stop being shocked God (or anyone else) would forgive our sins there’s a decent chance we are taking advantage of the kindness of God and others. 

We abuse grace when we refuse to extend it- 

No one should ever sin intentionally and then demand grace. However, when we are forgiven we become fully capable of extending grace (forgiveness, kindness, favor) to others. Refusing to give someone else the gift of grace we have been given freely is in many ways the ultimate abuse of the gift of grace (Matthew 18:21-35). 

God’s grace is an amazing gift. Grace is amazing partly because it is about more than simple forgiveness. Grace does save us from the penalty of sin and death, but once we are saved grace becomes an empowering force in our lives that enables us to do more and endure more than we could ever imagine (2nd Corinthians 12:9, Acts 4:33, Acts 6:8). Grace gives us the power to live a holy life and fully obey God (Titus 2:11-12). Grace empowers us to forgive the unforgivable. Grace allows us to love the unlovable and live as Jesus lived. We show our gratitude for this gift by managing it well and extending it often. 

How do we Resist the very Real Temptation to Become Bitter in the Ugly Moments of Life?

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

Relieve the troubles of my heart and free me from my anguish- Psalm 25:17 NIV 

Bitterness. 

It’s a big problem (Hebrews 12:15, Ephesians 4:31, Acts 8:23) and a sometimes overwhelming temptation.  Life in a chaotic, sin-sick world just kind of invites the sin of bitterness.

Seriously.

Anyone who lives long enough we will be treated badly by someone for absolutely no reason at all. At some point, the people we thought were trustworthy will turn out to be anything but. Bad things happen to people who least deserve it and most of us will lose someone we love long before we feel its time for them to go. If we experience enough loss, hurt, pain and/or betrayal, before long, bitterness becomes rooted in our hearts and our souls suffer.If left unchecked the cancer spreads to those we love most (Hebrews 12:15).

Sigh.  

The book of Hebrews warns against bitter roots because bitterness distorts the image of God that has been placed in us (1st Corinthians 15:49). The defiling that comes as a result of a bitter root creates untold chaos in the church, the family and the world at large. (Hebrews 12:15). The New Testament commands us to steer clear of bitterness (Ephesians 4:30-32, James 3:14-15)

David shows us how.  

If there is anyone in the history of history who had a whole horde of one-hundred-percent legit reasons to become super bitter and didn’t, it was David. David was marginalized by his Father (1st Samuel 16:1-11) and despised by his brothers (1st Samuel 17:28-29).  His first wife was rotten (1st Chronicles 29).  Saul hunted him down like an animal and attempted to murder him out of simple jealousy (1st Samuel 17-31). On top of all that it took a good, solid fifteen years for God to fulfill the promise He made that David would be king (1st Samuel 16:1-13). Rather than allowing the disappointment, confusion and betrayal he experienced to turn him into a bitter person, David instead, chose to become a better version of himself at every turn. 

The life of David teaches us five things about avoiding bitter roots: 

Always tell God how you feel–

Even a cursory reading of David’s psalms reveals an outrageous level of honesty on his part. David told God in no uncertain terms how much he loathed his enemies (Psalm 140:1-5). He frequently asked God to avenge the injustices done to him (Psalm 35:11-17, Psalm 109:6-15). He reminded God all the time that it was His job is to judge the wicked and he wasn’t above telling God He needed to get on it (Psalm 5:3-6). He also openly accused God of deliberately hiding from him (Psalm 10:1, Psalm 13:1).  In all this David models a healthy way for Christians to handle potentially destructive feelings. He didn’t attempt to crush his feelings or try to hide them. He didn’t pretend like he was somehow above having a bad day or going dark.  Instead He worked through every negative, ugly feeling he had with God until he got to the point he could genuinely praise God for His goodness (Psalm 10, Psalm 35, Psalm 59, Psalm 140, Psalm 109). When we take our fears, frustrations and disappointments to God He does not turn away from us, nor does He judge us for having feelings, even really, really negative feelings. Instead He comforts us and empowers us to process through our feelings in a way that prevents bitter roots.  

 It’s okay to feel but feelings should never run the show- 

It could be argued that David was very vocal about his most negative feelings. However, he never let those feelings drive the bus. David chose to what was right and pleasing to God even when he had been legitimately wronged and had good reason to seek revenge (1st Samuel 18:9-11, 1st Samuel 19:1-9, 1st Samuel 24, 1st Samuel 26). David understood that revenge does not bring us relief from our pain. It only compounds it (Leviticus 19:18, Romans 12:19).

 Listen to those who have your best interests at heart- 

In 1st Samuel twenty-five David was insulted in a big way by a horrible man named Nabal (1st Samuel 25:1-11). David spent some time reflecting on the situation. Before long he became angry and bitter towards Nabal (1stSamuel 25:12-13). He headed back to Nabal’s house to kill him. On his way there, David met Nabal’s wife Abigail and she gently but firmly reminded David he was better and God had more for Him than petty revenge (1st Samuel 25:23-31). David immediately saw the wisdom in her rebuke. He reversed course immediately and God blessed him for it (1st Samuel 25:32-35). God often brings a voice of reason into our most bitter moments. It is wisdom to heed their warnings. 

 Learn to praise God in the dark- 

David understood one danger of bitterness is that it can easily turn our hearts against God. If we allow bitterness to run its course we will begin to see God as the cause of our pain rather than the source of our comfort. Making the effort to find the good and then praise God for it acts as a protective shield against bitterness (Psalm 23:4, Psalm 71:20-22, Isaiah 49:13).  

Never hold a grudge- 

No one in all the Bible (except Jesus) was more willing to forgive than David (Matthew 6:15, Colossians 3:13). His willingness to let go of grudges enabled him to avoid the sin of bitterness and feel compassion and even love those who had done him wrong. David’s willingness to forgive is a key reason He was called a man after God’s own heart. 

 I have done my time in the pit of bitterness. 

 I have also (by the grace) of God escaped bitterness in situations that by all rights had every reason to make me a bitter angry jerk.  Through it all I have learned it is way easier to prevent bitterness than to pull oneself out of it.    

How do we Forgive the Jerks who Hurt Us?

Lisa M. Price1 Comment

If you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses- Matthew 6:14-15 NKJV

Let’s be real. 

Hard things are hard and God asks His kids to do a lot of legitimately hard things.

Jesus’ followers are called to love the unlovable, exercise self-control in the most unjust of circumstances and do good things to and for those who mistreat them (Luke 6:27 12:17-19, 1st Peter 3:17, Matthew 5:44). 

Dang.

However. Without question the hardest of all the hard things God’s people are called to do is to forgive. The New Testament passages that mandate total forgiveness are insanely comprehensive and leave no legitimate wiggle-room for compromise on the subject (Matthew 18:21-35, Mark 11:25, Colossians 3:13, 1st Peter 2:18-21). These requirements go so far as to teach that our being forgiven by God hinges on our willingness to forgive others. 

Yikes. 

Furthermore, Hebrews 12:15 tells us if unforgiveness is allowed to harden into bitterness the bitterness will not just defile (taint, corrupt, ruin) the bitter person but the people they love as well. 

Sigh. 

Over the course of the last fifteen years or so I have been “blessed” with several “opportunities” to forgive people who legitimately did not deserve to be forgiven. These were not small slights like having my feelings hurt, being overlooked in a social situation or being ignored by someone I felt should care about me. Each experience was extremely personal and painful.  To my knowledge, none of the people I had to forgive were actually sorry for anything they did. None of them ever apologized or even admitted any kind of wrongdoing. I will not be spilling the tea on the details. All anyone really needs to know is that all those situations were incredibly painful and ultimately demanded more of me than I honestly thought I was capable of giving at the time. 

Through those situations I learned there are steps that must be followed for the process of forgiveness to work itself out. These things don’t need to be done in a particular order. However, if any parts of the process are skipped or glossed over the forgiveness will be incomplete and our feelings towards the person who hurt us will harden into bitterness. 

 Following are the steps to forgiving others:

Recognize that forgiveness is a process rather than an event- 

Forgiving really big offenses is rarely, if ever, a one and done. Forgiveness begins with the choice to forgive. However, that choice must be followed by a commitment to do the work necessary to truly move on from the hurt. The length of time it takes to work through the process depends on many things including the level of hurt involved and the maturity of the person who was hurt. 

Ask God to help you-

Any reasonably mature adult can forgive a social slight or a minor offense easily.  However, there are some hurts and offenses so grievous that even the most spiritually mature people cannot forgive them without God’s help and guidance.  

Allow yourself to feel the impact of the hurt-

Anytime I hear someone who has just experienced a hurt at the hands of an evil person say “I forgive them”. My heart breaks for that person because I know they aren’t Jesus and Jesus is the only person who ever lived who is truly capable of forgiving an act of evil without first sorting through their feelings about the situation (Luke 23:34). Forgiveness is hard because it means surrendering the right we all feel we have to hold people accountable for sinning against us. Feeling the full, ugly impact of a hurt is excruciatingly painful. Therefore, it is tempting to simply utter the words “I forgive” without counting the cost and really working through how we feel about the person who hurt us. If we skip this step we will likely find that the feelings of forgiveness do not last long. Another possible consequence of skipping or glossing over this step is turning to substances (drugs, alcohol, food) to keep the bad feelings at bay.    All that being said, it is critical that we don’t get stuck in feeling the pain because if we do bitterness is inevitable. 

Find a person to help you process- 

God designed the human race in such a way that people need people (Genesis 2:18). Christians are commanded to comfort the hurting and to grieve with those who mourn (2nd Corinthians 1:3-5, 1st Thessalonians 2:11-12, Romans 12:15). No one needs comfort more or is grieving harder than someone who is processing a huge injustice.  If you are hurting find a Christian counselor, Pastor or mature Christian friend who can walk you through the process. If you happen to be in a good place right now commit yourself to being the person who helps someone when they need comfort (Matthew 5:9, James 3:18). 

Pray daily for the person who hurt you- 

You absolutely have to pray God blesses the person who hurt you. This one sucks in the worst way imaginable but it is also probably the most important. Thankfully you are not required to pray they will be blessed with a million dollars or their dream job. Instead, ask God to bless them with healthy self-awareness so they will begin to understand how their actions are affecting the people they interact with.  Ask God to put people and situations in their lives to help them become more self-aware and caring. Pray He will do whatever needs to be done in their lives for them to grow into the best version of themselves possible (Luke 6:28). Keep praying those prayers until you feel freed from any bitterness you feel towards the person who hurt you. 

Forgiveness is never easy.

That said, forgiveness is worth all the pain and trouble involved because the alternative is mental, emotional and spiritual bondage. Unforgiveness keeps us emotionally stuck, making it impossible to grow, change and be transformed into the image of Jesus.  Authentic forgiveness frees us from the mental bondage of thinking about the person who hurt us all the time. This frees us up to focus on the things that will empower us to become the people God wants us to be and that kind of freedom is worth any trouble and pain it takes to get there (2nd Corinthians 3:18).   

Dealing with the very Real Temptation to Become Bitter-

Lisa M. Price1 Comment

I loathe my very life; therefore, I will give free rein to my complaint and speak out in the bitterness of my soul~ Job 10:1 NIV

 Bitterness is not a subject discussed much in the church.

It ought to be because bitterness is something everyone struggles with at some point in their lives.

 Everyone is tempted to become bitter at some point, because bitterness is simply a byproduct of living in a fallen world. We are all sinners (Romans 3:23, Romans 5:12-14). Sinners universally have a tough time seeing their own issues and faults. Sinners also have a tough time seeing the effect their issues and faults have on others. Because most people, even most Christians, are really just sinful, clueless bumblers. People hurt others, sometimes without even realizing they are doing it. It is true, there are evil people who hurt others intentionally simply because they enjoy hurting people, but in my experience those people are fairly rare. Most folks just stumble around blindly, not realizing how much suffering, trouble and pain they are generating with their actions and choices.

Sigh.

  I have done my time in the pit of bitterness. Thanks to God’s mercy I came out of it with my faith, sanity and love for humanity firmly intact. Through the process of getting free I learned a thing or two about this rather painful subject. Including:  

 Bitterness feels awesome-

 Only a very few excessively sensitive souls become really bitter over stuff that wasn’t a big deal in the first place (Luke 17:1).  As a result, when we wallow around in bitterness it feels AWESOME, at first. Alcohol and bitterness have some weird things in common. Alcohol is a slow-acting poison. As we indulge, the poison begins to work. In the beginning we feel euphoric and awesome. However, if we drink too much for too long that choice can end in sickness, liver failure, brain damage and sometimes even death. Bitterness acts on our spirits in much the same way alcohol acts on our bodies. Because bitterness is almost always the result of a valid hurt, nursing feelings of bitterness is emotionally satisfying and feels great, at least in the beginning.  However, if we do not get a firm handle on our bitter feelings the choice to indulge them inevitably ends in the spiritual and emotional equivalent of acute alcohol poisoning or liver failure. Every analogy breaks down at some point and it is true of this one as well. The biggest difference between alcohol and bitterness is that a little bit of bitterness is never okay and there are no known benefits to bitterness. No one can indulge in a bitter spirit and walk away unscathed because bitterness is far more addictive and damaging than alcohol could ever be.   

 Prevention is the best medicine for bitterness–

 Hebrews 12:15 warns against allowing the sin of bitterness to take root in our lives. The text says:

See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.

The “see to it” wording of this verse tells us that the writer believed individuals have some personal responsibility when it comes to the sin of bitterness. There are times when circumstances that produce bitter roots appear out of nowhere and we have zero control over whether or not to allow those situations into our lives. There are also times when we simply cannot walk away from people or circumstances that have the potential to make us bitter. When that happens, our spiritual and moral responsibility is to deal with our feelings before God in a healthy way so that bitterness has no opportunity to take root in our lives.  That being said, there are also times in life when we willingly place ourselves in situations, or refuse to walk away from situations that we know from day one will be fertile ground for bitter roots.  Taking responsibility for ourselves in the area of bitterness means being cautious about which situations we allow ourselves to get into and which situations we choose to stay in (Proverbs 6:1-3).   

 Bitterness is a temptation before it is a sin-

 Bitterness is a choice (Ephesians 4:31). Like all choices, bitterness is not something we fall into like helpless chumps. We are tempted long before the sin overtakes us (1stCorinthians 10:13). Wise, mature Christians are emotionally vigilant, they pay attention to their feelings so that they can avoid getting caught-up in something sinful, like bitterness (1stPeter 5:8).

 Getting free from the sin of bitterness begins with recognizing that wallowing around in bitterness is every bit as sinful as whatever situation caused us to become bitter in the first place. In other words, we must confess our own sin. Then we must forgive the person who sinned against us. A key component of forgiving others is trusting God to deal with the person who sinned against us.  Praying for the person who sinned against us can help us let go of the desire for revenge.  Forgiveness is never easy and is typically a process that takes time. To get free we must take our hurt and pain to God until we are free from the hurt, anger and bitterness.

What You Can Do to Make the Church Great Again

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

 You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love~ Galatians 5:13 NIV

 The whole concept of the church is a strange one if you think about very deeply at all.

 Most organizations and institutions are founded by, led by and maintained by people who, for the most part, hail from similar socioeconomic backgrounds, have same types of upbringings and live in the same kinds of communities.

 Not so in the church.

 From its inception the church was filled with men and women from every tribe, tongue, education level and social class imaginable (Acts 2:5-12, 1stTimothy 6:2, Galatians 3:28, James 2:1-4, 1stCorinthians 12:13, Revelation 7:9).  The Church was intended from the very beginning to be a place where societal norms are challenged at every turn.

 God designed the church to be a place where serving is favored over being served (Matthew 23:1), where the weak are every bit as cherished as the strong and where each member is working for the good of every other member. Church is where every follower of Jesus regardless of age, race, gender or social position is equal and equally loved by God (Galatians 3:28). 

 All that being said, the distinctive design of the church has created some distinctive problems. For one thing, many people struggle to define exactly what the church is and how it should operate. Our culture (and most Christians) tend to believe that church is a location. A specific place that we go to hear spiritual messages and do spiritual things.

 The Bible depicts the church as a body, a living entity, made up of a whole lot of distinct parts that form a whole (1stCorinthians 12:12-27).  The church is not a building it is people who have been transformed by the power of the gospel and set free from the bondage of sin and death to preach the gospel and do good in this world.  

 Because we ARE the church, churches function best when each person in the church sees themselves as the church. Conversely, churches tend to be the least functional when the people in the church view church as simply a place we go once or twice a week to hear spiritual messages.

 There are at least five things each of us can do to be the church in our day-to-day lives including:

 Deal with bitterness-

 The Bible makes it clear that bitterness is something Christians must avoid at all costs. (Ephesians 4:31). This is because bitterness has a corrupting effect on people making them unfit for Christian service (Acts 8:22-24). Moreover, bitterness has an infectious quality, it spreads like a germ from the bitter person to the people around them (Hebrews 12:15). We deal with bitterness by forgiving the people who have hurt us and letting go of our anger towards them (Colossians 3:13). This not easy, nor is it typically something that happens all at once. Rather, it is usually a process that takes time and prayer to achieve.

 Encourage the right way-

 Over and over again New Testament believers are commanded to encourage one another (2ndCorinthians 13:11, 1stThessalonians 4:18, Hebrews 3:13) Contrary to popular belief an encourager is more than simply a cheerleader who goes around telling people how awesome they are all time.  Encouragers do make an effort to notice and comment on the good they see in other people. However, biblical encouragers understand that encouragement is the act of inspiring others to be the best version of themselves that they can be (1stThessalonians 5:11, Colossians 3:16). Sometimes this means giving generous and heartfelt praise for a job well done. Other times it means gently correcting and admonishing those who are not living up to the potential they have in Jesus (1stThessalonians 5:14).  

 Be more than a doer-

 These days there is a huge emphasis placed on being a doer of the word of God. We are told that authentic love for Jesus is reflected in what we do for other people in Jesus name. For the record, I do not disagree with that view in the slightest. However, the only way we can know for certain if we are really doing what God wants us to do for others is if we know what He says in His word (Psalm 119:05). The only way to know what the word says is to study it.

 Love one another-

  I will not lie. I debated about whether or not to include this one. Not because I don’t think love is important or critical to the health of the church (it is).  Rather, I struggled because I think the definition of love we have adopted in the church is rather milk-toasty and uninspiring. Authentic biblical love does more than help people feel good about where they are at right now. Authentic biblical love loves people where they are (Matthew 5:46) and tells the truth about the consequences of sin (Ephesians 4:17, Acts 17:30).   

  Find a local body and contribute what you can-

You are the church but you also need the church. Find one where the pastor values the word and where the people love each other and get involved. God will be pleased (3rdJohn 1:4), you will grow and the church will become stronger (Romans 12).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Is Guilt Always Bad?

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment


Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord.” And you forgave the guilt of my sin~ Psalm 32:5

Recently, I happened upon a Psychology Today article on the topic of guilt. Closer analysis revealed the article wasn’t really about guilt per se. Rather, the article was about how destructive and futile the writer (a psychotherapist with an alphabet soup of degrees behind his name) believes the whole notion of guilt is to the average human.

 The writer went to great lengths to convince the reader (in this case me) that guilt is nothing more than a societal and religious construct (a concept invented by society and religion to motivate people to do what “society” wants them to do). This writer believes, guilt serves no positive or healthy purpose for individuals. Rather, guilt keeps folks stuck in self-defeating patterns of behavior.

 When I finished reading the article I was convinced of little but the likelihood that the writer is simply a well meaning, highly educated, and extremely articulate nut-job. However, he did get me thinking more deeply about the subject of guilt. More specifically, he got me thinking about whether or not guilt is a good or a bad thing.

 The answer is “yes”.

 But, before we go there, I want to define the meaning of the word guilt for the purposes of this post. According to the word wizards at Dictionary.com, guilt is a feeling of responsibility or remorse for an offense, crime, wrong and etc., whether real or imagined.

 Okay.

 Call me old-fashioned, nutty or whatever you wish to call me. But, I have a tough time accepting the view that a feeling of remorse or responsibility after committing a crime or offense is a bad thing. The exception of course would be if the person were feeling guilt-ridden over a fictitious or imagined offense. That situation is a bit trickier to navigate. The nitty-gritties of dealing with imagined guilt are without a doubt way above my pay-grade and outside of the scope of this blog.

 That said.

 I am convinced that guilt is neither good nor bad. Guilt is like the check engine light on a car. It’s simply an indicator there’s something going on that ought to be explored more thoroughly. A persistent sense of guilt warrants some self-examination to see if we need to change course or apologize for something we’ve said or done.

 Admittedly, there are folks whose check engine light goes off for no good reason. Those types of people feel guilty over situations they had absolutely no control over. There are also those who feel guilty when someone sins against them, some even feel guilty over the sins others people have committed (like their parents, kids or spouse).

 Feeling guilty when we’ve done nothing wrong or sinful is false guilt. False guilt is one kind of guilt that really is a pointless waste of time. Wallowing around in false guilt can feel good and even self-righteous at times. However, it can keep us from seeing clearly the things we really did do wrong and are in need of repentance.

 Feeling guilty or regretful when we do sin or commit an offense is a good and healthy thing to feel (Psalm 51, Isaiah 66:2). Guilt drives spiritually and emotionally healthy people to contrition. Contrition motivates people to repentance (change) and changing bad people into better people is what God is all about (2nd Corinthians 7:10, Romans 2:4). However, guilt can quickly morph into a bad thing if we stay stuck and let the guilt fester into condemnation.

 Contrary to popular belief, condemnation is not the same thing as guilt. Condemnation is guilt’s ugly cousin, it breeds hopelessness and self-loathing by telling us that there is no way we can ever be good enough and that there is nothing we can ever do to be forgiven or become better. Condemnation, not guilt, is what keeps people stuck in unhealthy patterns of behavior.

 The Bible is clear that there is no condemnation (although there might be guilt when we sin) for Christians (Romans 8:1). In a society where people tend to either wallow in false guilt or deny there is any such thing as guilt, Christians need to model a healthy understanding of the issue. Christians should be quick to confess sin, eager to repent and ready to tell others about the freedom we have from condemnation in Christ.

What to do when God Calls You to Love a Jerk-

Lisa M. Price2 Comments

To you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you~ Luke 6:27-28 NIV

 Pretty much every Christian I know (myself included) likes to pontificate endlessly on the topic of love.

 Why on earth wouldn’t we?

 In a world increasingly more hostile towards Christians and their faith, love is one of the few doctrines left that everyone really digs. Sin, judgment, obedience and hell are sensitive, uncomfortable, sticky-wicket kinds of issues that are all-but certain to offend pretty much everyone and create all kinds of arguments, misunderstandings and relational chaos.

However.

No one can quarrel with the whole notion of loving people.

 That said, even a hasty analysis of the comments section of any news article or blog post  clues us in to the fact that although most people love the idea of love, and we adore quoting scriptures concerning the importance of loving people.

We struggle mightily with the implementation of loving people.

 The Christian standard of love is outrageously high and almost impossible to achieve (1st Corinthians 13, Matthew 5:44, John 13:34, 1st Peter 3:8, 1st John 2:10). Mostly, because some people are jerks and God calls us to love them anyway. Scripture commands we love people who do not love us back and even those who openly despise us. We are also instructed to love people who make fun of what we believe, insult our intelligence and tell lies about us (Romans 12:9-21).

 This is quite obviously easier said than done.

 There is no question that loving people (even nice people) is a concept that is far less painful to achieve in theory than in practice. That said, it’s easier to love a person when there is relationship in place or an emotional bond that has already been established.

 Showing love to a wayward child or a spouse with a less than pleasant disposition is somehow much easier than trying to muster up some emotional warmth or caring for a heartless, egomaniacal boss or an intellectually pretentious brother-in-law/college professor/auntie/co-worker. The one who cannot seem to stop themselves from insinuating that the only possible motivations anyone could possibly have for voting for a particular political party would be racism, homophobia or a criminal level of stupidity. It’s even harder to muster grace (let alone love) for the media personality who is constantly undermining decency and openly supporting actions and attitudes wholeheartedly contrary to God’s way of doing things.

 Sigh.    

 Thankfully, authentic Christian love is more about making a choice than manufacturing a feeling. We can choose to behave in a loving way towards people we don’t particularly like. In the process we might actually change hearts and minds in a way that hateful and nasty rhetoric or sidelong glances never will.

 Loving jerks needs to begin with some honest self-examination. Sometimes we are the innocent victims of jerks and other times we are the ones acting like a jerk (2nd Corinthians 13:5, Colossians 3:5-11). Even genuine Christians, are capable of less than Christian behavior from time-to-time, especially when someone is intentionally pushing our buttons. Any time we feel offended or hurt, it’s a good time to prayerfully evaluate our own actions and attitudes to see if we are doing anything that is contributing to the problem.

 Nothing about honest self-examination is pleasant or easy, however it is necessary if we want to grow and mature spiritually (Romans 12:2, Colossians 3, Galatians 5:13-26).

 Sigh.

 If after some soul-searching we discover we are indeed part of the problem, then we need to repent. Repentance is all about changing how we think about the person who has hurt us. Instead of focusing on the things we don’t like about the other person we need to look for positive qualities. We also need to cease any hurtful actions on our part such as gossip, ugly or passive-aggressive comments, and writing rude things about the person on the Internet etc.. Genuine repentance always includes praying for the person who wronged us (Luke 6:28.

 Praying for the person who offended or wronged us really does make any repenting on our part that needs to be done easier and less painful, and prayer actually has the capacity to change the heart of the other person.

 Bonus.

 Then God calls us to the truly hard thing, blessing those who curse us and actually doing good to those who have wronged us. Doing good is about more than an absence of malice. It’s about thinking through to what Jesus would do to the person and then doing it.

 Love is an action.

 

Who’s to Blame for the Blame Game?

Lisa M. Price2 Comments

 

I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh; for the willing is present in me, but the doing of the good is not.  For the good that I want, I do not do, but I practice the very evil that I do not want~ Romans 7:18-19 NASB

 I have concluded that our society has lost all connection to reason and common sense. Following is a small sampling of the evidence:

Any parent who has had a child who has been bullied will tell you that school counselors always tell the kid being bullied that they should feel compassion towards the one bullying them because the bully “has had a tough life”. A psychology professor at the University of Queensland made headlines with good news for cheaters. He asserts it is evolution and genetics, rather than morality or ethics that is ultimately responsible for a wandering eye.

 Last year ISIS recorded the brutal decapitations of twenty-one Coptic Christians. Secretary of State John Kerry cited lack of jobs and educational opportunities as the cause of the savagery. TLC has a show that follows the life of a teenage boy who wants to be, and is in the process of becoming, a girl. His parents blame fate for imprisoning their boy in the wrong body and say they support their son’s decision to pursue life as a female because they want their child to be “who ‘she’ really is” (what?).

 There’s more.

 It’s guns not the criminals who kill people blamed for gun violence. Schools and teachers- rather than parents and their children—are blamed for the poor academic performance of students. Fatty food and sugary soft drinks are often cited as the cause of health issues. Nobody blames the folks who eat the food and drink the sodas for the obesity, heart disease and diabetes.

 Video games, movies, television and rap music are routinely blamed for the degenerate conduct of millions of young people. No one ever talks about the parents who fork over their hard-earned cash so their kids can indulge themselves in sketchy entertainment choices or the kids who willingly and wantonly fill their minds with garbage.

 Every Christian with even a shred of rational thought left in their head ought to be concerned about how we got to this place as a society. This is a big deal. The tendency to blame is changing our society and the thinking has infiltrated Christian circles. We blame liberals for introducing worldly and heretical philosophies into the church. We blame the culture for normalizing abnormal sexual behaviors but little is said about the Christians who CHOOSE to believe the lies and embrace the behaviors.

 I am persuaded that our inclination to blame things rather than people is more of a spiritual issue than a societal one. At the root of this problem lies ignorance concerning the reality of human nature. Most churches have all but given-up on teaching the Christian doctrine that explains why people do the stuff they do. For those of you who are thinking about tuning me out (I know you’re out there) because I dropped the dreaded D-word (doctrine) hear me out. This is thought-provoking stuff.

 I promise.

 Years ago pastors and teachers in Evangelical churches became weary with teaching their congregations that human beings are inherently bad or born sinful, even though the teaching is found in many passages of Scripture, including: Psalm 51:5, Isaiah 64:6-7, Romans 5:12-14 and 1st Timothy 1:15-16. Understandably the teaching that people are born with a sinful nature made some folks feel bad and some Christian teachers concluded that making folks feel bad about themselves and their choices was keeping the church from reaching its full potential. So they dropped the doctrine of original sin like an ugly prom date and promptly moved on to cheerier topics.

 For decades many have accepted the deception that human beings are perfect little snowflakes. Buying into that deception means we also have to believe that any bad behavior on the part of our fellow humans or ourselves has to be the fault of outside forces rather than the fault of the person doing the sinning. So we blame mental illness, bad parenting, evolution, fate, food, the devil, coworkers, hormones, genetics or our spouse for our bad behavior. Nobody wants to face the unpleasant reality that we, rather than outside forces are usually the problem.

 It’s time for reformation of personal responsibility.

 The most successful societal reformations have all started with God’s people. It’s time for pastors to get back to the teaching of doctrine, including the doctrine of original sin, but it’s also time for individual Christians to become more aware of our own propensity to blame rather than take responsibility. Then we need to be an example and own up to our own issues.

 Change begins with us.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Finding Authentic Freedom-

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

For the Lord God is a sun and shield; The Lord gives grace and glory; No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly~ Psalm 84:11

 Content warning ahead:

 Our family drove to the Oregon coast this past weekend to connect with my four siblings for the first time since our Mother died eight-years-ago. The reunion was a blessing in every sense. However, it was also chaotic (in a good, loud, big-family kind of way) and a marathon of frenzied activity from start to finish.

 I left the beach emotionally gratified and seriously sleep deprived.

 The emotional hullabaloo and lack of sleep combined with too much time to think on the drive home left me feeling a bit navel-gaze-y. Evidently, one possible side effect of too much reflection is an overly emotional blog post. That little disclaimer out of the way, I do believe that I may have hit on some spiritual truth in the midst of at least some of my musings.

 For that reason I pray you’ll give it a read.

 As we passed through a really ugly part of Eastern Oregon it occurred to me that Christians seldom talk about the fall of mankind anymore. We should because our world and everything in it was dramatically distorted in the blink of an eye and not just spiritually. The fall altered how we relate to God, one another and even the natural world. Relationships that were once carefree and easy to navigate suddenly became complex and even adversarial.

 One of the results of living in a fallen world is that even the best stuff in life often has a distinctly sad edge to it.

 Reunions are happy but the separations that instigated the reunions never are. Parenthood is one of the most joyful events a person experience in this life; it is also one of the most difficult and befuddling. Roses have thorns; every profit has a loss built into it. Human innovation typically has at least one unintended and profoundly unpleasant consequence- and cake makes us fat.  

 This reality plays out in the spiritual realm as well.

 Spiritual growth and the blessings that go with it can only be achieved through an oftentimes-painful surrendering of our very selves. Forgiving others brings freedom but at the cost of forfeiting the basic right most of us feel we should have: the right to seek revenge on the jerks that hurt us. The fall even affected our feelings about right and wrong and our perception of reality. Wrong typically feels right and is usually the path of least resistance. Right is always the harder road to traverse.

 Even the grace of God has a sad side to it. Grace, that thing we rejoice in, venerate and write songs about is only necessary because of sin, sin ruined literally everything and sin breaks the heart of God.

 Gloomy, I know.

Grace is necessary because human beings blew it and were powerless to stop blowing it for even a single minute. God is relentlessly generous, so when it became appallingly obvious that there was no way any of us could be good on our own God stepped in. He sent His son to die for us and gave us the grace we needed.

 This realization was almost too much to bear. I was done in.

 Mostly because I have come to believe that our generation has a fundamental misunderstanding of the nature of grace and our lack of understanding is keeping us from becoming the people God has ordained us to be. We tend to view grace as nothing more than a massive bucket of forgiveness we can dip into anytime we have a sin that needs forgiving. We treat forgiveness like a magic concoction we apply to sin to make it acceptable, rather than an essential concession to our sinfulness.

 Thankfully, grace is much more than just a big bucket of forgiveness.

 Grace is power that frees us from the oppression of sin. The grace of God does more than simply forgive our transgressions. The grace of God gives us the power to overcome the sin nature that plagues us all (Titus 2:10-12). When we make the choice to live a holy life (Colossians 3:5-14, 1st Thessalonians 4:3-8, 2nd Peter 1:3-11) God dispenses the grace we need when we need it. That grace empowers us embrace the behaviors we need to embrace and let go of the behaviors we need to let go of so that we can be like Jesus.