Category: Living it out

Strategic Keys to Preventing Spiritual Burnout, Backsliding and Deconstruction-

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

Rid yourselves of all malice and all deceit and hypocrisy and envy and all slander, and like newborn babies, long for the pure milk of the word, so that by it you may grow in respect to salvation,if you have tasted the kindness of the Lord- 1st Peter 2:1-3 NASB

We all have them in our lives. 

People we love and care about who started the race of faith with a lot of hullabaloo and determination. Nevertheless, something went terribly wrong and they either deconstructed loudly and proudly or burnt-out slowly and left the Christian faith quietly. 

Their condition is sad, befuddling and scary all at the same time. It’s sad because we love them want everyone to experience every good thing Jesus has to offer (John 10:10). It’s befuddling because we cannot help but wonder what on earth happened. Were they never really believers?  If they are believers, will they make into heaven by the skin of their teeth with zero rewards? It’s scary because we don’t really know what the spiritual outcome will be for them.

Sadly, all the above questions are a bit above my paygrade. 

 I honestly don’t know if those who profess Christ and then regress permanently were ever really saved or not. Nor do I know what it will be like for them on judgment day. Jesus made it clear that there are people who appear to be Christians and are not (Matthew 13:30, Matthew 25).  It’s also true we are saved by grace, not works (Romans 3:23-24, Ephesians 2:8-9). However, everyone will receive rewards in keeping with their works (Matthew 6:1-6, Matthew 25:14-29, 1st Corinthians 3:15).

I do know God is gracious and good (Luke 15:11-32, 1st John 1:9, Lamentations 3:22). Therefore, prevention is without a doubt more important than understanding the ins-and-outs of issues that are above our paygrade. The sad reality is regression (or backsliding) can happen to anyone (Hebrews 5:12-14, Romans 1:21). It doesn’t matter if the person has been a believer (or even a Christian leader) for a long time. Nor does it matter how many cool things they have done for the kingdom. Regression happens to every classification of Christian. Because Jesus had nothing good to say about quitters (Luke 9:62) today we are going to look at the most common causes of spiritual regression and how to prevent them. 

Drift- 

The book of Hebrews has a lot to say about the spiritual dangers of drift (Hebrews 2:1-4, Hebrews 5:12-14, Hebrews 10:25). Drift usually begins with a tough season that leads to a low-level spiritual burnout.  Everything in life is hard and deep in our hearts we know God could make things easier on us if He was willing and obviously, He is not willing or the season would be less hard. So, we intentionally or subconsciously slow communication with the Almighty to a trickle. As a result, our Bibles get a bit dusty, church attendance becomes spotty and our prayers are more fleeting and compulsory than passionate and honest.  Before we know it, it’s like “God who?”. The key to preventing drift is accountability to other people and a rock-solid commitment to appropriately dealing with our anger at God (see point four) and trusting Him to do what’s best for us even when the circumstances of our lives are not all we hoped they would be. 

 Ditching church- 

Attending Church doesn’t make a person a Christian, nor does church attendance automatically make an attender spiritually healthy. However, church attendance is a gage of our spiritual temperature.  A desire to ditch church is a clear indicator of a problem. However, attending a healthy, gospel proclaiming church puts us in proximity to things and people that encourage and promote growth like other Christians, solid Bible teaching and prayer (James 5:16). 

Lack of intentional growth- 

Spiritual growth does not happen without effort (2nd Peter 1:3-11).  Choosing to grow means making a daily commitment to pray, learn the Bible and practice holiness (Isaiah 35:8, 2nd Corinthians 7:1). Choosing to grow also means deciding every single day to get up and persevere in our faith even when life gets hard and God feels distant.  It means never giving up or giving into spiritual laziness (Hebrews 6:11). 

Hurt that gets the better of us-

The Bible does not shy away from the reality that this life is full of pain and heartache (Romans 8:18, 2ndCorinthians 1:5). If we are not careful the trouble and tribulation that’s a normal consequence of living in a fallen world can cause us to become bitter towards God. Bitterness can lead to spiritual defection (Matthew 13:21, Matthew 24:9-10, Hebrews 12:15). On the other hand, pain and hurt can cause us to grow and become even more rooted in our faith (1st Peter 1:6-9). Prayer and close Christian friends are the keys to keeping the tough stuff from getting the best of us (Matthew 26:14, 1st Peter 4:7, Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, Hebrews 10:24-25, 1st Thessalonians 5:11). However, waiting until there’s a crisis to build community or cultivate a prayer life will not do a whole lot for us. Prayer and community should be a priority for every Christian. The tough times will come (John 16:33) it’s on us to be spiritually prepared for those times (Matthew 7:24-27).  

And finally,  

Getting hung up on the stuff we don’t understand- 

No human being is capable of fully understanding why God does what He does (Isaiah 55:8-9). This means that when we come up against seasons of life or circumstances that make no sense. In those moments the only spiritually logical response is to trust and believe God is good and He is diligently working things out for our good (Romans 8:28). 

Solving the Worry Problem-

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

If I say, “My foot slips”, Your mercy, O Lord, will hold me up.In the multitude of my anxieties within me, Your comforts delight my soul- Psalm 94:18-20 NKJV

Worry. 

We all do it. 

Just about every human on earth worries about the past, the future, their careers, their finances, their kids, their marriages, their health and the health of the people they love. Christians worry about the same stuff everyone else worries about. The biggest difference between Christians and non-Christians when it comes to worry is Christians feel guilty when they worry and most non-Christians simply see it as a problem to be medicated into extinction. As a result, worry and anxiety has become big business. In 2007 America spent eighteen billion dollars to medicate anxiety disorders in the United States.  That number does not include what was spent on counseling or herbal supplements used to treat anxiety and worry. 

That’s a lot of worry and a big old pile of money. 

The two questions Christians ought to ask themselves are: 

Is worry a sin? 

And 

What do I do about worry? 

Many Christians believe it is a sin to worry. Team “worry is a sin” believes there are verses that prove Jesus explicitly forbid worry (Luke 12:22-25, 1st Peter 5:7). They also believe His apostles reiterated His teaching in their letters. Team “worry is a sin” also believes any concern expressed over anything is worry and consequently is a sin. Ironically these teachings generate a lot of worry for a lot of folks.

I do not encourage Christians to worry (more on this later). That said, I am a member of team “worry is not a sin” for a couple of reasons. First, there are zero verses that explicitly state worry is a sin.  Furthermore, worry and anxiety do not appear on any of the “sin lists” in the Bible (Romans 1:18-32, 1st Corinthians 6:9-11, Galatians 5:19-21, 1st Timothy 1:8). Most significantly, Jesus’ teachings on worry seems to show deep concern for the wellbeing of the worrier (Matthew 6:25-26). Nowhere does Jesus indicate that worriers are sinning or in spiritual danger due to their anxiety (Hebrews 4:15). It’s also true the Bible makes a distinction between worry and appropriate concern. The apostles did not worry their heads off about anything. However, many of them expressed deep concern over issues in their letters, including false teachers (Acts 20, 2nd Peter 2:1, Jude), bad doctrine (1st Timothy 1:3, Hebrews 13:9, 1st John 4:1, 2nd Timothy 4:3) and sinful people impacting the church negatively (2nd Timothy 3:1-5, 1st Corinthians 5:1-12). There is nothing wrong with showing appropriate concern if your child is running in front of a car or you are being chased by a bear. Nonetheless, it is neurotic and unhealthy to lay around and worry about such things if they aren’t happening.  

That being said.

Just because something is not a sin doesn’t mean it’s beneficial (1st Corinthians 10:23).  To the contrary, Jesus’ teaching in Luke twelve makes it clear that worry is pointless and changes nothing.  So, what do we do about worry? In a broken and fallen world there is no end of things to worry about. However, there are some things we can do that will help us deal with worry appropriately. All of these (if done consistently) will have a bonus consequence of drawing us into closer relationship with Jesus.  

Be proactive about inviting God into the problem-solving process- 

I am convinced that this life is simply a training ground for whatever God has for believers in the next life (Matthew 25:1-29). This means our problems are more than just annoyances or things to get worked up over. They are opportunities to learn and grow into better people so that we are ready for the responsibilities of the next life. This means that problem solving is not running ahead of God (as some say). Instead, problem solving is an opportunity to grow as people learn from God and develop a skillset that will benefit us in this life and the next one. But in order for that to happen we have to invite God into every issue of life through prayer and be willing to let His spirit lead us to problem solve effectively. 

Make a daily practice of remembering the goodness of God-

Sometimes, we worry simply because we have forgotten all the ways and times God has rescued us, provided for us or protected us in the past. Making a practice of remembering how God has come through for us in the past is the best way to prevent the spiritual amnesia that leads to pointless, soul-sucking worry (Psalm 77:11, Deuteronomy 4:12, Psalm 103:2). 

Be intentional about putting the rest in God’s hands-

 I do not think worry is a sin. That said I do think a yearning to be in complete control of everything is (Proverbs 19:21, Psalm 37:4-6). Conquering worry begins with accepting the reality that control is elusive (impossible) in a fallen world. We must also acknowledge that much of our anxiety is related to our fear of loss of control (Isaiah 41:10, Psalm 118:6). It is simply a fact that there will always be things in life that are worrying and even intimidating. Our job as Christians is not to pretend everything is fine when it isn’t. Instead, God wants us to take our worries and fears to Him in prayer until those fears transform into child-like trust and love (Galatians 5:25). 

Four Clear Indicators a Christian is Walking in the Light-

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

Your light must shine before people in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven- Matthew 5:16 NASB

Okay, so, true confession time: 

 I know (and believe with all my heart) that all Scripture is good, useful and instructive (1st Timothy 3:16). Consequently, I believe everyone should read the Bible, all of it, not just the parts that give us good feels. Nonetheless, I am human and sadly there are books of the Bible I tend to avoid for devotional reading. Some of them make sense. Numbers is kind of depressing as is most of Judges.  I tend to avoid them both. The minor prophets involve a lot of thinking, because you have to know (and in my case remember) a lot of biblical history in order to understand them. Leviticus is well, Leviticus.  No one really likes Leviticus. 

However, some of the books I tend to avoid make a lot less sense. I think some of it comes down to writing style. 1stJohn is one of the books I tend to avoid. The Apostle John was definitely one of Jesus’ besties. He was also a VERY wordy guy, and I tend to gravitate towards a more abbreviated style of writing. 

Nonetheless, I recently felt compelled by the Holy Spirit to spend some quality time in the book of 1st John.  It has been incredibly gratifying. This little book is packed with wisdom, DEEP theology and some warnings that are especially relevant to our time. 

John begins his letter by stating in a very lovely but wordy kind of a way that Jesus is “life”. This means anyone who is “in Jesus” (2nd Corinthians 5:17, Romans 6:11, Romans 6:23) will experience the earthly joy and honor of becoming partakers of God’s divine nature (2nd Peter 1:4) and a life of bliss and fellowship with God forever (1stCorinthians 2:9). Then John describes both Jesus and the Father as “light”. This means God is a being that has no darkness, evil or sin in Him. He describes our relationship to the God of light in this way:

This is the message we have heard from Him and announce to you, that God is Light, and in Him there is no darkness at all.If we say that we have fellowship with Him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth- 1stJohn 1:5-7

 John makes it clear that a person can know, beyond a shadow of a doubt whether or not they are “in the light” or fumbling around in spiritual and moral darkness. Walking in the light means we are walking in holiness, love and truth. 

So, how do we know if we are walking in the light? There are four markers that clearly indicate a Christian is walking in the light and in fellowship with the God of light. They are:

Walking in the light means we love other Christians- 

John makes it clear that one direct measure of one’s spiritual maturity is their love for other Christians (1st John 2:9-11, John 13:34-35, John 15:11-13, Romans 12:10, Galatians 5:13). Unfortunately, many Christians either flat-out ignore this command and make a regular practice of publicly saying unkind things about fellow believers or they love other Christians in a manner that is not really scriptural.  Christian love should never devolve into a sappy sentimental kind of emotionalism that celebrates walking in sin or immaturity. Genuine Christian love receives people as they are but loves them enough to help them grow and transform into someone infinitely better and more holy (1st Corinthians 13, 1st Peter 2:2, 2nd Peter 1:3-11, Ephesians 4:17-32). Christian love is always all about wanting the moral and spiritual best for everyone. 

Walking in the light means we are real about who we are-  

A genuine believer in Jesus does not pretend to be perfect or without sin (1st John 1:8). Nor do they lecture others on the importance of transparency and holiness while they sin their faces off. Genuine Christians are real about their own struggles and never hide their sin. An individual who is walking in the light makes a regular practice of confessing their sin to God and to other Christians (Acts 19:17-19, James 5:16, 1st John 1:9).  

Walking in the light means we hate our own sin- 

Sin is one of the primary themes of 1st John. John’s aim is to answer the question: Can a born-again believer sin? His answer is a qualified “yes”. John is clear a Christian can sin, but he also makes it clear it’s abnormal for them to choose a life of sin and/or deceit (1st John 3:4-10). If a Christian sins, Jesus will advocate (help, root for, defend) for them and forgive their sin (1st John 1:7-10, John 2:1-2). HOWEVER, John also makes it clear that our eagerness (or lack of eagerness) to obey God’s commands is a powerful indicator of our salvation, or lack thereof (1st John 2:3-6).   

And finally, 

Walking in the light means we want light-  

According to the Apostle the Christian faith is a series of progressive moves towards more holiness, more righteousness and more truth. This means that if we are walking in the light, we will have a voracious appetite for even more light. Anyone who wants more light goes to great lengths to deal with the sin in their lives and love others with greater fervency all the time (1st John 4:7). 

The Biblical Definition of Humility-

Lisa M. Price2 Comments

Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.”Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you- 1st Peter 5:6 ESV

Humility, is not, nor has it ever been a particularly popular subject. Nobody really likes it. If humility were a person, it would be the really decent, down-to-earth guy or gal everyone respects but no one wants to talk to at a party because they are just a little too good and that makes everyone else feel bad.

It’s just not fun. 

Nevertheless, after a recent trip through 1st Peter where humility is a reoccurring theme.  I felt compelled to dig a little deeper into what God has to say about humility. 

The words “humble” and “humility” are used a total of eighty-three times in the Old and New Testament. Humility or the state of being humble is always linked to blessing when embraced (Proverbs 22:4, Proverbs 15:33, Zephaniah 2:3, 2nd Chronicles 7:14, 2nd Chronicles 12:6-12, 2nd Chronicles 32:26, James 4:10).  It’s also linked to curses when snubbed (2nd Samuel 22:8, 2nd Chronicles 28:19, 2nd Chronicles 33;22-24). There is no way around it: God blesses and promotes the humble. No one with any sense at all wants to miss out on blessing and promotion.

So, what does it really mean to act with humility? 

The Greek word for humility is tapeinophrosýnē it means: “to have a deep sense of one’s own (moral) littleness”. 

 I confess I was seriously underwhelmed by that definition. 

I expected more. A lot more. I expected a more colorful description, more specifics, possibly even a bad example or two. I figured the definition would include things like having zero pride, being a giver of grace and mercy, possessing concern for the welfare of others, a subdued view of oneself and deep respect for God and His moral directives. Then it hit me pretty much outa nowhere that when we have a deep sense of our own moral littleness our pride evaporates, other people become a priority, we are suddenly far less judgy and our view of ourselves shrinks like a cheap cotton shirt washed in hot water. A gut level awareness of our own moral littleness also causes our respect for God and His commands grows exponentially.

Humility is potent (and beneficial) because when we become aware of our own moral littleness, we know exactly how weak and fallible we really are. We become deeply aware of what we don’t know and will likely never know. At that point, we understand deep down in our heart-of-hearts that we have no right to judge others because we deserve to be judged in the harshest way imaginable. As a result, we become gracious, merciful and kind even to people who don’t deserve mercy, grace or kindness. 

It’s deeply paradoxical that developing an acute awareness of our own moral littleness (evil) has the power to make us more like the most morally perfect creature in all the universe: God Himself. 

Okay, so how do we get a better handle on humility? 

There are only two ways to acquire humility. We can be humbled involuntarily by God, or we can choose to humble ourselves (Exodus 10:3, 2nd Kings 22:14-20, Matthew 23:12, James 4:10, 1st Peter 5:5-6).  I highly recommend option two. Option one works, but it’s a tough road because God is a pro at humbling the proud (Proverbs 11:12, Proverbs 29:23). Option two requires more effort, but it is far less painful in the long run. 

We gain a better understanding of our own moral littleness by:

Knowing the limitations of our own goodness- 

No human being is morally perfect (Psalm 106:6, Romans 3:23). Even the best human decisions and choices are often influenced by shady motives and a desire to manipulate God and other people into doing what we want. An awareness of our moral limitations does not make us morally perfect, but it does make us more humble about our own virtuousness. This in turn keeps pride to a minimum. An absence of pride creates a fertile ground for humility to take root. 

Having a proper view of God- 

God is morally perfect (Deuteronomy 32:4, Psalm 18:30, Psalm 145:17, John 3:16-17, 2nd Peter 3:9). When we allow ourselves to lose sight of this reality, we stop looking to Him for help and guidance. This causes us to develop an inflated view of our own ability to judge people and situations. An inflated view of our ability to judge right from wrong often leads to accusing God of sin and wrongdoing (Job 1:22). Not cool. 

Practicing ruthless self-examination-

The key to avoiding pride and developing real humility is to know ourselves. When we know ourselves, we develop a willingness to second guess our assessments of people and situations. When we understand exactly how flawed we are we become less likely to insist we are right about everything. This understanding is the cornerstone of humility and a critical steppingstone to true wisdom (Proverbs 2:1-22. 

And finally, we gain humility when we make a practice of: 

Asking for help-

God created us to be dependent on God and interdependent on others. Anytime we deny this reality and insist on doing life free of advice and help we inevitably become fools who think we are wise (Proverbs 1:25-33). Making a habit of asking for help, advice and wisdom sets us up for greatness in God’s eyes. Humility also creates space for wisdom to grow and God to bless our lives (1st Peter 5:5-6, James 4:6). We could all use a little more of that in our lives.

What’s God Doing When Everything Goes Wrong in our Lives?

Lisa M. Price1 Comment

Do not sin; meditate in your heart upon your bed and be still. Offer the sacrifices of righteousness, and trust in the Lord-  Psalm 4:4-5 NASB

In Exodus twelve God gives instructions for the Passover. His instructions are insanely specific. This feast (like all the feasts) was not intended to be a DIY kind of a deal. The main dish was a lamb. The lamb was to be one year old, in perfect condition with zero blemishes or defects. It was to be roasted, no boiled or raw meat allowed. The sides were also precisely dictated. Bitter herbs and unleavened bread were the only options. The meal was to be eaten in community. No one was allowed to eat alone. If there were not enough people in a household to eat a lamb, then they were to invite their neighbors to eat with them. The meal was to be eaten fully clothed. No lazing around shoeless or beltless. EVERYONE had to be ready to hit the road at a moment’s notice.  Then comes the crazy part:

Whatever is left of it until morning, you shall completely burn with fire- Exodus 12:10b

When I got to that verse I did a double take. The people of Israel were leaving the country. God knew they were leaving the country. God just spent elven chapters orchestrating their departure. Furthermore, it wasn’t a small group. There were six-hundred-thousand men plus women and children (Exodus 12:37). They would all be leaving Egypt for a destination known only to the Lord, and NO ONE was allowed to pack a lunch. 

What? 

The command feels insanely counter intuitive. Surely,  God would want His people to have a nice lamb sandwich to eat on the road? It just makes sense. But then it occurred to me that God actually does this sort of thing all the time. He tells His people to do something hard and then He makes it harder (Genesis 22, Joshua 1, Jonah 1-3, Matthew 10:5-10). 

It’s all about trust. 

God wants His people to trust Him. Because God has a critically important end goal in mind (more on that later) He almost never makes it easy to do so. This means that at some point in our faith journey we will come up against a situation where it will make zero sense to trust God or do it His way, but we need to do it anyway.  Our crazy situation might be a job loss, marriage troubles, kid troubles, betrayal, or some other horrible loss or trial. Only God knows what it will be, but it will happen. It’s the nature of living in a fallen world. Following are four things to watch out for when the going gets tough and God is asking us to trust Him. The first is:  

Making an Ishmael-

Unless one is a hardcore Calvinist it is hard to argue against the notion that Ishmael (Genesis 16) was anything but the sad byproduct of two people who did not trust God to do what He said He would do. Abraham and Sarah’s hasty decision nearly broke Hagar, damaged poor Ismael and caused geopolitical complications the world still feels today. Anyone can make an Ismael (metaphorically speaking). An Ismael is always the byproduct of running ahead of God in a fit of mistrust and “taking care” of situations in our own understanding and wisdom (Proverbs 3:6-7). This sort of thing happens frequently in the realm of marriage. Someone prays for a godly spouse and when the prayer isn’t answered quickly, they find someone, anyone who is willing marry them. In these situations, the marriage often becomes an Ismael: a source of pain and complication in the person’s life. The good news is God will use the messiest, most messed-up Ismael we can make to grow us and shape us into the image of Jesus (Romans 8:28). It’s just never the preferred route. 

Fear- 

Fear is more than just a feeling we experience when life gets hard or scary. Fear is an indicator. Our fears tell us what (or who) we trust to give us security, peace and a sense of belonging and purpose (job, reputation, financial security, relationships, possessions). This means that whatever we most fear losing is probably the very thing God most wants us to learn to trust Him with (Psalm 20:7, Jeremiah 17:5-9, Isaiah 49:10, Joshua 1:9).  

A bitter root-

Anytime we are called to trust God there is always a danger of a bitter root developing in our hearts (Hebrews 12:15). This is because there always comes a God time where it looks like God is either doing nothing to help us; or conversely it looks like He’s doing the exact opposite of what needs to be done to keep disaster at bay. When this happens, all we can do is believe God is good (Psalm 34:8, Psalm 100:5, Isaiah 41:10, Jeremiah 29:11, Philippians 4:19, James 1:17). Then we wait for the storm to pass and the blessings to be revealed. 

And finally, we must make sure:

We don’t miss the end goal- 

The end goal of trusting God is not trusting God, nor is it obedience simply for the sake of obedience. The end goal of our learning to trust God is for us to become people God can use for His glory and the good of others (James 1:2-3, 1st Peter 1:3-9). Learning to trust Him is how He gets us to that place.  It was true in Exodus. God wanted the Hebrews to trust Him because trusting God with hard things would mold them into a nation that would reveal His glory (and the Messiah) to the whole world.  Unfortunately, it took them forty years to become those people. Don’t be like the Israelites (James 1:6-7).

How to Make Permanent Changes-

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

Neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexual, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor those habitually drunk, nor verbal abusers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God. Such were some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God- 1st Corinthians 6:9b-11 NASB

Christianity is a good news bad news kind of a deal. 

The bad news of Christianity is that people are fallen and super sinful (Genesis 3) and because God loves people He does not want anyone to stay that way (Romans 12:2, Ephesians 4:17-24, John 3:16). Sin is the most harmful thing in the universe. If it is allowed to run wild it ALWAYS leads to our eternal destruction (Romans 6:23, 2ndThessalonians 1:7-9, Revelation 21:8).  

The good news of Christianity is that anyone who submits their life to the Lordship of Jesus Christ will be saved from the penalty of sin (hell) and given the supernatural ability (through the power of the Holy Spirit) to change (Acts 2:21, Titus 2:11-12, 2nd Timothy 1:9, Hebrews 9:28). The Holy Spirit empowers Christ followers to change their outward behavior AND their hearts. The result is that anyone who submits themselves to the Lordship of Jesus can actually become like Jesus from the inside out (2nd Corinthians 2:10, 2nd Corinthains 5:17, James 1:4, Hebrews 5:12-14). It’s a beautiful thing. 

Unfortunately.

We live in a weird world where many people, even many Christians behave as if they don’t really believe real and lasting change possible, even for Christians (Romans 6:11, 1st Corinthians 1:2, 2nd Corinthians 5:17, Ephesians 2:1-9). This view has oozed into how churches do discipleship and deal with sin. It has become disturbingly common for churches and church leaders to just expect new Christians to live as they have always lived. Repentance is rarely discussed, therefore many folks who identify as “serious Christians” have sex with people they are not married to, dishonor their parents, commit fraud or are greedy, selfish, jealous, unforgiving, slanderous, rude, arrogant and ungrateful (2nd Timothy 3:1-3). 

All very sinful and not okay for God’s holy people (1st Peter 2:9-11). 

No where is this situation better demonstrated than with a theology infiltrating many otherwise solid Christian churches. This theology is known as Side B. Side B teaches a person can be a Christian and identify as a gay person if they don’t have sex with someone of the same gender. 

What? 

Since when is that okay? Christians do not identify as their sin. This is no different than saying it’s okay to be a gossipy Christian, a Christian thief or a lying Christian.  God calls His people to change. It is not okay to settle for a consecrated version of our old sinful self. Change is never easy, however if a person is in Christ, it is possible if we do the following:  

Understand and live out our new identity- 

If a person is a Christian, their identity is as a follower of Jesus Christ. Period. Even things like our sex, race and country of origin are no longer our primary identify (Galatians 3:26-29). It is definitely not okay to find our identity in our sexual preferences, our worst sin or our most regrettable personality trait (Romans 8:1).  Believers in Jesus are a new creation in Christ (Colossians 1:1-3, Colossians 3:3, Ephesians 2:19). Understanding and owning this new identity empowers us to live out our new self, made in the image of Jesus. 

Own the problem- 

We must own our sin and call it out as sin. We cannot pretend we are without sin nor can we act as if our sin isn’t wrong if want to have any hope of real and lasting change (1st John 1:8-10). God is unspeakably gracious, kind and patient with us (Psalm 86:15, Psalm 116:5, Romans 8:32, 2nd Peter 3:9). He will meet us where we at as long as we confess our sin as sin. Being real and honest with ourselves, God and our closest Christian friends concerning our sin is a first step towards receiving the power we need to make permanent changes (James 5:16). 

Don’t wait for desires to catch up with behavior-

Over and over again God tells us to behave in a manner that reflects repentance and salvation whether we feel like it or not (Matthew 3:8, Acts 26:20b, 2nd Peter 1:5-11, Colossians 3). This isn’t because God wants to torture us, it’s because He understands how our brains work. God knows that changing our behavior changes the neural pathways in our brains. As our neural pathways change, we develop a desire to keep doing the things that have created those new pathways.  Unfortunately, many folks wait for their desires to change before they deal with bad behavior. This pretty much ensures we will never experience real and lasting change. 

Get some help- 

A pastor, mature Christian friend or a Christian counselor can help us to figure out why we do what we do (Proverbs 11:14, Proverbs 15:22). Behavior has roots. A person may struggle with greed because they experienced poverty as a child. A woman may look to men for affirmation because she didn’t get healthy affirmation from her dad.  A person may struggle with addiction because they want to forget a traumatic event. These experiences do not excuse our sin. However, understanding the why of our sin does help us to change it.  Think about a behavior you have that you want to change and then pray for wisdom (1st Kings 22:5, Psalm 16:7). Spend some time thinking about what happened in your past that might make you prone to that behavior. Then run your thoughts past God, a friend, counselor and/or a pastor. It will not be long before you have a better handle on that behavior. 

And finally:

Ask God to do what you cannot do- 

There are simply some things we cannot do on our own. Change is one of those things, and that’s okay. God does not want us to the Christian life on our own, in our own power and strength (Philippians 4:13). He wants us to ask Him for help. He wants to partner with us on our journey (John 15:1-27, Philippians 2:12-13, Hebrews 13:20-21). It’s how we grow closer to Him and become all He calls us to be (Philippians 1:6). 

God’s Prescription for Dealing with Toxic People-

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

Put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. Colossians 3:10b ESV

Toxicity has become the latest buzzword in pop culture lingo. One cannot scroll social media, read a magazine or peruse a news site without finding at least one article, reel or post disparaging toxic people and lamenting the impact they have on others.  Most content focuses on traits associated with either “narcissism” or “codependency”.  Narcissism is characterized by a grandiose sense of self-importance, lack of empathy, a need for excessive appreciation, and the belief that one is unique and worthy of special treatment. Codependency on the other hand is characterized by extreme neediness and a desire to control and manipulate others into doing what the codependent person feels is best. Codependent people feel most significant when they are needed. As a result, they will go to great lengths to become the most essential and indispensable person in every given relationship. 

These folks wreck a lot of havoc.

Therefore, nearly all the content recommends kicking toxic people to the curb and purging one’s life of their noxious existence forever. A whole industry has built up around this issue. There are therapists who specialize in helping folks to separate from narcissistic, annoying, overly needy and controlling people. The internet is flooded with influencers who center ALL their content around identifying and avoiding toxic people. There are entire books written about removing of toxic people from one’s life. This has become a movement. 

This movement is not Christian (sorry). It is not okay for Christians to adopt an attitude of unforgiveness towards anyone (Matthew 6:15, Matthew 18:35, Ephesians 1:7, Colossians 3:12-14), James 3:12-17), no matter how aggravating they happen to be (Matthew 18:20-22). I understand reality. There are truly abusive and/or evil people in this world. God does not call us to be friends with those who have abused us or done us wrong in a really big way. I am not suggesting Christians stop saying no, allow themselves to be truly abused, forgo healthy limits or become doormats. God calls His people to use common sense and discernment (1st Kings 3:9, Proverbs 10:13).  

That being said.

Like it or not, God calls His people to be kind, tender-hearted and forgiving towards all people, even really annoying and/or stupid people (Ephesians 4:23, Luke 6:27, 2nd Timothy 2:23-26, 1st Peter 3:9). There are no provisions in Jesus’ commands on forgiveness and love that grant anyone permission to exclude jerks, narcissists or needy people who thrive on control from the commands to love others and forgive from the heart (Matthew 5:46, John 13:34-35, Romans 12:10, Romans 13:8). Sometimes I wish there was, but there’s not. I’ve done the research. 

We must understand that no one is without sin (Romans 3:23, 1st John 1:9-10) Everyone on earth (you and I included) have some (or many) toxic personality traits (Matthew 15:19, Jeremiah 17:9, Proverbs 6:16-19, Romans 1:18-29). We are all defensive, lustful, pretentious, vindictive, judgmental, rude, lazy, deceitful, competitive, lacking in self-awareness, argumentative, selfish, prideful, arrogant, passive-aggressive, domineering, manipulative and/or needy at least some of the time. It’s called being human. 

 God does not want us to run away from people who have toxic personality traits. God wants us to learn to love those who are totally unlovable and toxic (Matthew 5:44, Romans 12:20, 1st Peter 3:9, Proverbs 24:17, Proverbs 25:21). It is critical we learn to love difficult people because we too are unlovable (at least sometimes), and we reap what we sow. In His infinite wisdom God has set the world up in such a way that we always receive more than we give. (Hosea 8:7, Hosea 10:12, Matthew 25:14-30, Galatians 6:7-8). I don’t know why, but I do know it’s true. If we make a regular practice of forgiving others, loving well and giving grace we will be loved, forgiven and given grace we don’t deserve. However, if we make a practice of holding grudges, judging others, withholding forgiveness or cutting people out, we will at some point find ourselves receiving the same treatment.    

No one wants that. 

Dealing with toxicity comes down to three things. We must learn to:

Apply grace-

Some synonymous for grace are mercy, kindness and compassion. God gives human beings boundless grace (Romans 3:23-25, Ephesians 2:8-9). God is always merciful, kind and compassionate towards our failings. Our primary job in this world post-salvation is to take on as many characteristics of God as possible (Romans 8:29, 1stCorinthians 3:18, Ephesians 2:10, Colossians 3:3). Becoming gracious towards the failings of others is probably the best place to start in our journey to become more like Jesus. I believe anytime a Christian refuses to give grace to others they are turning away from the Christian gospel and embracing a worldly (non-Christian) belief system (Galatians 1:6-7). 

Pray like crazy-

Prayer is critical when dealing with difficult people because there are some things humans simply cannot do without God’s help (Mark 9:14-29). No one can love a difficult or sinful person without God’s power working in them. No one can forgive certain offenses without the aid of the Holy Spirit. Prayer is where we get the power to do the impossible (James 1:5, John 15:7).  

And finally, we need to:

Seek wisdom-

None of this is simple or easy. Situations are often complex. There are few (if any) one-size-fits-all solutions for dealing with difficult people. This where wisdom comes in: sometimes God is calling us to say “yes” even when we don’t feel like it. Other times “no” is the wiser and more godly option. Sometimes we need to love more demonstrably, other times limits need to be set and adhered to.  No one will get any of this right without godly wisdom. We get wisdom by searching the Bible for it, seeking godly (not worldly) counsel and asking God to give us wisdom in abundance (Luke 21:14-15, Colossians 1:9, James 1:5). God never says “no” to that request. 

What does the Book of Exodus Teach us about Spiritual Warfare in Real Life?

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

Beloved, do not be surprised at the fiery trial when it comes upon you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you.  But rejoice insofar as you share Christ’s sufferings, that you may also rejoice and be glad when his glory is revealed- 1st Peter 4:11-13 ESV

I recently started reading through the book of Exodus with a friend. It’s been a minute (as the kids say) since I read Exodus and whenever I reread a book I haven’t read in a while God reveals some new insights. So far, its chapters four and five that have captured my attention. 

In chapter three God introduces Himself to Moses by means of a bush that is on fire but does not burn up (weird). God then promised Moses that the Hebrew people would be liberated after four hundred years of slavery and suffering in Egypt. The whole chapter is (for the most part) pretty upbeat and positive. God does indicate there will a few hiccups along the way (Exodus 3:19-21). Even with those caveats God’s promises to Moses are awesome. The Hebrews will leave Egypt; God will give them a land flowing with “milk and honey “and they will collect great riches as they leave Egypt (Exodus 3:21-22).   

It’s all good.

In chapter four God begins to reveal His plan to Moses.  It all starts with requesting Pharaoh allow the Hebrews to go into the desert to worship God.  God does mention something (almost in passing) about hardening Pharaoh’s heart. Turns out this was a critical bit of information.  

In chapter five everything appears to go sideways. Moses goes to Pharoh. Who was not at all inclined to dismiss his workforce even for a church service (Exodus 5:1-5). Then Pharaoh fights dirty. He accused the Hebrews of laziness and having too much time on their hands. He increased his demands, now insisting the slaves provide their own straw for the bricks, adding more labor to an already labor-intensive process. The Hebrews did not handle this initial hardship well. They grumbled and complained and even accused poor Moses of deliberately trying to ruin their lives (Exodus 5:20-21).

It’s kind of an unpleasant read.

Mostly because these two chapters are more than just biblical history, they are also an example of what spiritual warfare often “looks like” in real life (2nd Corinthians 10:3-5, Ephesians 6:10-18, James 4:7, 1st Peter 5:8, Daniel 10:12-14). There are at least two principals regarding spiritual warfare we can glean from these chapters:

When the spiritual stakes are high obedience doesn’t always mean immediate victory-  

In this narrative Moses obeys God to the letter: he goes to the people, and in the beginning, the people believed Moses and responded in a faithful fashion (Exodus 4:31). Then everything went south. Pharah was disrespectful, spiteful and just plain mean. The people’s faith fell apart in short order. Once their faith began to unravel, they turned on Moses and accused Him of intentionally causing them harm. Moses responded to this development the same way many people tend to respond to difficulty following an act of spiritual obedience. He doubted God and even accused Him of wrongdoing (Exodus 5:22-23). Moses forgot (just like we tend to) that we are playing a spiritual long game. The rewards for obedience in this life are seldom immediate and in some cases obedience to God results an even tougher time in the short run. When evil rages and the going gets tough we must cling to the promises of God and choose to live by faith rather than sight (Habakuk 2:3, Psalm 37:5-6, Ecclesiastes 3:11, Romans 8:28-39, Hebrews 11). 

When the spiritual stakes are high things get ugly fast- 

The people involved in this story (even Moses) did not really understand what was at stake in their situation. God wasn’t just keeping a promise He made to Abraham (Genesis 12:1-3, Genesis 15:13-14). God was doing more than showing compassion to a group of people who were being oppressed. He was doing more than building a new nation. God had a bigger picture in mind than any of that. God was literally laying the foundation for the redemption of the human race (Genesis 3:15, Romans 8:2, Revelation 1:5). God had promised the Messiah would come through the nation of Israel (Genesis 18:17-19, Genesis 22:17-18, Genesis 49:10). No nation of Israel means no Jesus. No Jesus means no redemption. Therefore, the spiritual stakes could not have been ANY higher.  When the spiritual stakes are high the enemy of our souls (Satan) fights hard and dirty.  It was true then and it’s still true today. This means that if you are “going through it” right now there is probably more at stake from a spiritual perspective than you are capable of understanding. When Satan fights hard and dirty it simply means God has a bigger plan for everyone involved. 

 This matters because I believe that the number one reason people give up on God and the Christian life is disillusionment. We obey God, pray like crazy and trust God for big things and everything falls apart. Life gets tougher and our trials become more intense. Then the enemy swoops in and tells us God doesn’t love us (Zephaniah 3:17, John 3:16, Romans 8:37-39). Satan whispers in our ear that God is not on our side and the Christian life is just a pointless waste of time. All lies (John 8:44). Truth-be-told, the harder things get from a spiritual perspective the more likely we are to be in the will of God. Spiritual difficulty may also indicate we are closer to Jesus’ return and our redemption than any of us can imagine (Luke 21:1-28). 

Five Steps to Letting go of Bitterness-

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

 For I see that you are poisoned by bitterness and bound by iniquity- Acts 8:23 NKJV 

Everyone (no matter how spiritual) is tempted to hold onto feelings of bitterness at some point in their lives. This is because bitterness rarely occurs in a vacuum. Too often life is wildly disappointing. Moreover, people can be disappointing. People sometimes hurt us in ugly and shocking ways that make resentment, anger and unforgiveness make sense in our minds. Disappointment and bitterness go hand-in-hand. Further complicating the whole messy muddle, entertaining feelings of bitterness feels kind of awesome, at least for a while. The writer of Hebrews 12:14 warns bitter feelings allowed to run wild will eventually grow into a “root of bitterness”. It says:

See to it that no one comes short of the grace of God; that no root of bitterness springing up causes trouble, and by it many become defiled- NASB

The writer of Hebrews is obviously warning their readers that bitterness is (for want of another term) super bad. The writer also wants readers to understand bitterness is grotesquely consequential. No one in their right mind wants to miss out on the grace (mercy, kindness, generosity) of God. Nor do normal, spiritually healthy people want to defile (corrupt, ruin, pervert) others with the corruption of their own heart.  

The kind of bitterness the writer of Hebrews is warning their readers about is more than just temporary anger or fleeting resentment. A bitter root is anger and resentment that takes up habitation in a person’s heart and becomes a focus of their thinking. A bitter root is offense that has mutated into deep-seated unforgiveness (Ephesians 4:26). Bitterness is initially directed at the person or people who caused the pain. However, if bitterness is allowed to settle it becomes directed towards those who had nothing to do with the hurt. When we allow bitterness to become a stronghold, we can even become bitter towards God.  

Yikes.

Bitterness is choosing anger and resentment over forgiveness and mercy (Matthew 18:21-23, Matthew 6:12-15).  This choice stalls our spiritual growth and steals our personal peace. Bitterness can even steal the joy of our salvation. All that to say, a bitter root is bad. Really, really bad.  So, what do we do about bitterness? How do we deal with it effectively? There are five steps to effectively dealing with bitterness:

Recognize it-

Satan is able to tempt people to become bitter because many people (including many Christians) lack a healthy level of self-awareness (1st Peter 5:8). It is critical we know our own feelings and understand the state of our own heart. Self-awareness allows us to see when feelings of bitterness are creeping in and defiling us. We obtain self-awareness by making a practice of naming our feelings and tracing those feelings back to the incident that is making us feel bad/angry/hurt/bitter. Once we know what is at the root of our bitterness we can do something about it. 

Pray for the person who made you bitter- 

Praying for those who hurt us is critical and not because fervent prayer is guaranteed to change the person who hurt us into a better person. It might and it might not. People must cooperate with God to experience transformation (Romans 12:2, 1st Corinthians 5:12).  The world is full of people who reject and/or disobey God, these folks are incapable of genuine heart-change. That being said, anytime we choose to pray God changes us. Prayer changes us into people who forgive the people who have done us wrong.  This allows us to move on in a way that is healthy for us and honoring to God.  

Trust God with what He’s allowed. 

I almost said we need to forgive God for the things He allows into our lives but that’s REALLY TERRIBLE THEOLOGY. People don’t forgive God because God does not sin (Deuteronomy 32:4, Psalm 145:17, James 1:13, Titus 1:2). God is perfect in all His ways (whether we understand them or not), therefore, God has not done anything that demands our forgiveness (Psalm 19:7, Matthew 5:48). Nonetheless, we need to get to a place where we are okay with whatever God has allowed into our lives. That means we need to trust that God would never allow anything into our lives that won’t somehow be used for our good and His glory (Romans 8:28-39). This is no easy task. It takes faith and willingness to trust God with things we may never completely understand this side of heaven (Hebrews 11:1-39).

Release the person to God- 

The essence of forgiveness is to surrender our right to seek revenge (Romans 12:19). The only way to effectively surrender that right is to give the person who hurt us over to God and trust Him to deal with the situation appropriately. This is never easy and it’s it’s rarely a one and done. Typically, we have to give people over to God repeatedly before our hearts change and we no longer feel bitter. 

And finally: 

We must choose to forgive-

Forgiveness is moving on and letting go of the hurt. It’s choosing to not look back on the offense all the time. To do this, we must grasp the reality that God has more for us than bitterness, unforgiveness and resentment. However, we can only receive the fullness of what God has for us if we choose to forgive (Matthew 6:14-15). A wise and perceptive person once said choosing bitterness is like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies. That strategy has never worked for anyone in the whole history of forever. Choosing to be bitter has no impact on the other person. Nonetheless, bitterness destroys us emotionally and spiritually. In the process, we lose our joy, stop growing and become spiritually ineffective. No one wants that. 

Becoming a Difference Maker-

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

Faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead. But someone will say, “You have faith; I have deeds.” Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by my deeds- James 2:17b-18

The very first thing the Bible says about human beings is that we are made in the image of God (1:26-27). This rudimentary theological fact manifests itself in a profound longing to create beauty, build, discover, reproduce and conquer the unknown and unconquered. This universal desire is real-world evidence of the image of God being played out in the lives of ALL people. It does not matter if a person chooses to acknowledge God or not. God’s image is still in them and so are all the aspirations and longings that go along with it. 

All people want to make a mark on this world. 

For those who do not know God this desire is most often revealed in a desire to make money, control events or rule over others and make oneself known (famous). For those who are born again (John 3:1-15) the longing to make a mark on this world should shift into a desire to make God known. If a Christian is correctly discipled, they will, over time, become more God-centered than self-centered (Matthew 28:19-20, 1st Peter 2:9). Therefore, a mature and growing Christian does not want to make a mark on the world simply for their own gain or recognition. A growing Christian wants to make a mark on this world for the good of other people and the glory of God (Matthew 28:16-20). For believers in Jesus good works or making a difference in this world is not optional, nor is it legalism. It is literally what were saved for (Matthew 5:13-16, Ephesians 2:8-10, James 2:17-18). Too often, Christians become discouraged from making their own mark on the world for Jesus because they see the notoriety of “famous Christians” like a Charlie Kirk or Billy Graham and think their contribution to the body of Christ will never have a huge impact, so it’s pointless to try. This is a lie straight from the pit of hell, intended to keep Christians focused on the earthly rather than the eternal.  Every believer was designed by God to reveal God to the world through good works they do in their day-to-day lives. 

The story of Tabithia (Dorcas) is found in Acts 9:36-41. She is the ultimate example of an “average” Christian who became a difference maker by taking her gifts, talents and abilities and using them for the good of others and the glory of God. Tabithia was a woman known throughout her church and community for caring for the needs of others. She was a seamstress who made clothing for the poor in her community (a very big deal back in the day). Presumably, she didn’t just make clothing she also told others about Jesus as she provided for their needs.  Tabithia made such a huge difference in the lives of the people in her community that her death created a huge void in the church and a bit of a crisis in the greater community. So much so, that some of the men in the church went to great lengths to find the apostle Peter in hopes that he could raise her from the dead so that she could continue her ministry. We become that kind of a difference maker by doing the following: 

Make a regular habit of seeking the Lord- 

When we seek God with all of hearts through prayer, Bible study and deep reflection on our Bible study, God reveals Himself to us in very real ways (Jeremiah 29:13, Psalm 105:4, Isaiah 58:2).  The more we know God and the deeper our personal experiences go with God the more spiritual power we will have to make Him known. When we know God intimately, we naturally become good representatives and ambassadors of God in a world that desperately needs a clear vision of God (2nd Corinthians 5:20). 

Find your gift and use it- 

Every Christian has at least one spiritual gift as well as some natural talents (1st Corinthians 12:4-11, Ephesians 4:7-8). Find your gift then ask God to show you how to use it to reach the maximum number of people.  

Figure out what needs to be done and do it-

There is no end to the things that need to be done inside the four walls of the local church. Many of the things that need to be done are not glamorous. However, when they get done God is honored and people are changed. There are people who need to be greeted, coffee that needs to be brewed, meals that need to be made, worship that needs to be led and children that need to be taught the word of God.  By choosing to serve in whatever way is needed in your local church you will glorify God and be used to bring about spiritual transformation in others (Romans 12). 

Don’t pursue followers-

Sadly, in our world many Christians decline to do what they can for the kingdom because they want to do something people will notice and get excited about. Truth-be-told other Christians may or may not notice or care about your contribution, but God will. God sees everything and rewards those who diligently serve Him (Matthew 6:13, Matthew 25:21, Revelation 22:12).

And finally,

It’s critical we remember that the things we do in our own power and strength will amount to very little in this world (1st Corinthians 3:10-15). It’s only things we do out of the overflow of our relationship with God that result in transformation. If you make a practice of seeking God and His righteousness first, the difference making is sure to follow (Matthew 6:33).