Tag: hard issues

What We Have to do to Solve the Syrian Refugee Crisis

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

Do not let wisdom and understanding out of your sight, preserve sound judgment and discretion; they will be life for you~ Proverbs 3:21-22a NIV

 The terrorist attacks that began last week in Paris did more than simply prove once and for all that the Middle East is not at all like Vegas. What happens there does not stay there. Their problems eventually become our problems.

 The Syrian refugee crisis is not a new issue, nor is it confined to Syria. Christians, Jews, Yazidis and some Muslims began fleeing Afghanistan and Iraq when ISIS gained a foothold in those countries after the United States military pulled out of Iraq in 2009. The Syrian conflict that began in 2011 enlarged ISIS territory and drastically increased the number of refugees seeking asylum. To date, at least twelve million men, women and children have sought protection from the carnage and genocide in the Middle East.

 The recent terrorist attacks have complicated the situation. Prior to the Paris attacks President Obama agreed to admit ten thousand refugees into the United States. When it was discovered that at least one of terrorists involved in the Paris attack entered France by posing as a Syrian refugee, the U.S. and other countries began rescinding offers of asylum. And now the fate of every Syrian refugee hangs in the balance.

 There are two positions regarding the refugees: some are compassionate, some are cautious. The cautious folks (many of them Christians) feel that allowing anyone from the Middle East into our country for any reason increases the risk of a terrorist attack on American soil. The cautious make the case that the economy is far from recovered, and refugees would put additional pressure on an already stressed system.

 They also point out that our government has an established record of incompetence when it comes to virtually every task imaginable. Most do not believe that the Obama administration should be trusted to adequately examine the backgrounds of thousands of people fleeing a war-torn country with little or no identification. Many coming from this perspective are willing to allow refugees into the country eventually. They just want some guarantees that the emigrants allowed in will be self-supporting and will not be entering under false pretenses to wreak havoc on American citizens.

 The compassionate folks (many of them Christians) believe that America is a big, generous country with many of resources. Therefore America ought to help whoever needs it. They believe that because the process to enter the U.S. takes eighteen to twenty-four months the risk of terrorists entering the country is relatively small.

 These folks point out that many, if not most of the refugees are Christians who face certain death if returned to their country of origin. The compassionate recognize the hard truth that any one of us could find ourselves in the same position as the refugees and ask what we would want done for us if we found ourselves in such a horrific place.

 Both the cautious and the compassionate have valid points. The refugees do need help, the United States should be a part of the solution, and at least some of the refugees likely pose a genuine threat to U.S. citizens. However, both the cautious and the compassionate entirely miss the larger issue.

 They forget that these refugees did not appear out of thin air. Cold-blooded adherents to a bloodthirsty death cult drove these people from their homes because they want to create a country of their own, a country where they make the rules. The religious whack-nuts responsible for the refugee crisis have enslaved countless innocents, beheaded Christians and Jews, thrown homosexuals from buildings, disfigured the faces of women and routinely rape boys and girls as young as eight. These animals cannot be reasoned with because they are, by their very nature, unreasonable beings.

 Finding a solution to the Syrian refugee crisis is going to require more than compassion or caution. It will require action on the part of Western nations, including the United States. The refugees need to be placed in safe zones (preferably in Europe) overseen by the United Nations while Western nations band together to accomplish the only truly humane option for these folks.

 We must annihilate ISIS and give the refugees their countries back. Sending refugees to Europe or bringing them to the U.S. appears to be a compassionate course of action but in actuality it only delays unraveling the real problem, which is the existence of ISIS.

 No one in his or her right mind WANTS our country to fight another war in the Middle East. Wars are expensive and there have been far too many fought on that real estate in recent years. That said, this is not a pointless war; it is a just war and it’s worth the cost. It’s time to act like grown-ups and deal with the reality we have, not the one we wish we had. ISIS and their ilk will not stop unless they are stopped. It is up to Western Nations to put an end to the madness before the poison spreads. What happens in the Middle East does not stay in the Middle East.

 

 

 

 

The Real Root of Our Problems

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

They rejected God’s decrees and the covenant he had made with their ancestors and the statutes he had warned them to keep. They followed worthless idols and themselves became worthless. They imitated the nations around them although the Lord had ordered them, “Do not do as they do.” 2nd Kings 17:15

 Last week I and millions of other Americans watched in horror as the news of the day unfolded. The story has become depressingly common. Another bloodbath at another school in another sleepy little town where no one ever dreamed anything that awful could happen.

 There were no actual surprises in the details. The killer was another socially stunted loner from a broken home with few friends or ties to his community. Gun hoarding, collecting war memorabilia and hating appear to have been his only hobbies.

 The only aspect of this story more foreseeable than the details of the killer’s life was the reaction from politicians and pundits. The accusations and calls for change commenced before the bodies were counted. The anti-gun guys predictably blamed easy access to guns. The pro-gun guys blamed a lack of armed guards on campus. Politicians insisted that more laws will solve everything and physiologists blamed the breakdown of our mental healthcare system.

 Everybody is talking but no one is asking the one question that really needs to be answered: Why is our society devolving at such a rapid pace?

 A mass shooting is technically defined as a shooting where four or more people are shot or wounded in a single attack. There was not a single reported mass shooting in America in the year 1915; in fact, mass shootings were practically unheard of prior to 1963. As of today, there have been 298 mass shootings this year. For those keeping count, that is more than one shooting a day so far in 2015.

 America is and has always been a country of gun owners. Statistics are unobtainable, but it seems safe to assume that more Americans owned guns in 1915 than in 2015. It’s also patently absurd to argue that it was somehow more difficult to acquire a gun a century ago than it is today.

 It is demonstrably true that our mental healthcare system is in serious trouble. Good counselors are tough to find and even tougher for many folks to afford. An obviously deranged lunatic can only be committed after he or she actually hurts someone. Doctors hand out prescriptions for medications no one truly understands with little follow-up on those taking powerful, mind-altering drugs. All that being said, it’s still fanciful to argue that the mental healthcare available a hundred years ago was somehow superior to the mental healthcare available today.

 Stricter laws sound like a reasonable no-hassle solution to our problems. But truth- be-told, there are already plenty of laws governing gun ownership. However, lawbreakers have a vexing habit of simply disregarding the existing laws and because past behavior is always the best predictor of future behavior; it’s fairly safe to assume criminals would simply ignore any new legislation.

 Blaming guns, laws or the mental healthcare system for shootings and other social problems is naïve and misguided. If we continue to blame things rather than people, we will commit societal suicide because we cannot solve problems we refuse to see.

 It is fashionable to blame guns, laws and shoddy healthcare for the problem of gun violence. It’s also intellectually lazy and irrational. If guns, laws or healthcare were the problem, the same problems would have existed a hundred years ago. The real problem lies squarely at the feet of the individuals in our society. Individual people build societies, and our society is generating an increasing number of individuals who have no conscience and who place zero value on human life.

 The problems began when we decided as a society that we could have morality without God or fixed standards of right and wrong. Gun violence is just one symptom of the societal breakdown that was triggered by our makeshift morality and the irrational social engineering that has followed.

 If as individuals we want real and lasting change, it is critical that we stop looking to politicians and pundits to solve our problems. Their well-intended “solutions” limit freedom and do nothing to solve the real problems.  

It’s time we start looking to God.

 

 

 

 

 

Whatever Happened to Higher Standards?

Lisa M. Price3 Comments

Conduct yourselves in a manner worthy of the gospel of Christ, so that whether I come and see you or remain absent, I will hear of you that you are standing firm in one spirit, with one mind striving together for the faith of the gospel~ Philippians 1:27 NASB

 I recently reached a milestone I was not expecting to reach for at least another couple of decades. I have officially lived long enough to be astounded by the changes I have seen in my lifetime.

 Just a few short years ago blackberries and apples were fruit. Green was a color not a movement. Crocs were reptiles. Living together prior to marriage was considered way out of the mainstream. People used payphones in emergencies. Restaurants had smoking sections and watches had a practical rather than simply decorative purpose.

 Tweeting was something birds did. Microwave ovens were for rich people. No one had ever heard of social media, reality television, iPods, helicopter parenting, DVDs, online dating or life coaches.

 Changes have not been exclusively reserved for the technological and secular spheres of life. The Church has seen more than its fair share of radical shifts in the years since I became a Christian.

 There was a time in the not-so-distant past when no one in the Church had ever heard of coffee bars, the emergent church movement or the purpose-driven ministry model. Worship teams, small groups, overhead projectors for music and padded chairs (as opposed to pews) were considered cutting edge ministry innovations.

 I don’t have a problem with tweaking the way we do Church. There is nothing heretical about changing how we reach a relentlessly changing culture. I do have a problem with change for the sake of change. Change for change’s sake is a silly waste of time, spiritual energy and fiscal resources

 One change I find particularly troubling is the tendency to shy away from holding anyone to a higher standard of behavior. Back in the day, Pastors and Bible teachers spent a great deal of time highlighting the importance of Christians being different and living their lives at a higher level of morality than the rest of the culture.

 Today I want to make a case for living life at a higher standard. I am not advocating high moral values for non-Christians. Non-Christians should not be expected to behave like Christians. Neither am I advocating eccentricity (being different for the sake of being different) or legalism (doing things or adopting behaviors in an effort to earn salvation). I am advocating a return to a pursuit of holiness and Christian distinctiveness (1st Peter 2:9). Higher standards of behavior benefit believers in at least three ways:

 Higher standards cause non-Christians to self-evaluate- 1st Peter 3:1

 When Christians make the effort of living their lives according to God’s standards, marriages tend to be stronger and families more loving. Folks tend to be more content with what they have and suffer from fewer life-controlling addictions and behaviors. Non-Christians observe the differences and sometimes the disparities trigger self-evaluation of their priorities and lifestyle choices. Assessments of lifestyle choices often lead to repentance and a relationship with Jesus.

 Higher standards act as a safeguard- Proverbs 3:5-6, Psalm 119:45

 God’s decrees aren’t magic bullets but sometimes they look and feel like it. Families are happier and healthier when parents follow biblical principles for family life. Managing money according to biblical principles shelters folks from many financial disasters. God’s rules for sex have protected generations from heartbreak, disease and unintended pregnancy. Doing life God’s way inevitably produces superior outcomes and happier human beings.  

 Higher standards deepen our relationship with God- Psalm 62:7, 2nd Corinthians 12:9

 Living life by biblical standards is not easy, and it is not something we accomplish without God’s help. The commitment to live at a level we are not really capable of forces us to seek a deeper dependency on God. If you don’t feel you need God’s help to live up the moral standards you’ve set for yourself, your standards are not high enough.

 Christians have confused moral standards with legalism and rigidity for far too long. It is not legalistic to be vigilant about what we allow into their minds via books, television, music or other forms of media (Proverbs 4:23). It may be antiquated, but it’s not legalistic to be cautious about the words we use (Ephesians 4:29). It is not puritanical to believe that Christians should not divorce without biblical grounds or that God’s views on sexuality (1st Thessalonians 4:3-8) are still relevant today.

 A return to higher standards of morality will empower individual Christians to reach a world that urgently needs to witness the power of holiness in action.

 

 

 

The Real Have-Not’s

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them~ Deuteronomy 4:9

 

All hell broke loose in the Charm City this past week.

 Madness and pandemonium erupted after the funeral of twenty-five year old Freddie Gray. Gray died of unexplained injuries sustained while in police custody. The particulars of this case are unsettling and raise serious questions about police practices and potential brutality.

 From a social and spiritual perspective the reaction to Gray’s death is every bit as troubling as the case itself. It appeared that the entire city collectively lost its mind: buildings were burned to the ground, businesses plundered, onlookers attacked for any and no reason. Twenty police officers were injured, six of them seriously.

 These events have had the chattering class chattering around-the-clock. Reporters and pundits have debated the details of the case nearly to death and have theorized endlessly on why the people of Baltimore would react with such tremendous violence. Poverty has been identified as the principal cause for the behavior of the rioters.

 Journalists and social commentators have repeatedly referred to residents of West Baltimore as “have-nots.” Some of these same commentators have used poverty not only as an excuse for bad behavior but as a justification. I do not dispute the fact that many, if not most, residents of West Baltimore are poor and in many respects disadvantaged. That fact is plain and indisputable. I do take issue with the notion that poverty automatically puts people in the category of “have-nots” and that poverty is a viable justification for violence, anarchy and hate.

 The poor have been a part of human society since the dawn of human society. Jesus himself promised that poor people would continue to be a part of human society as along as human society endures (Matthew 26:11). There is nothing fundamentally wrong with being poor, just as there is nothing immoral about being rich. It is how one reacts to the conditions they were born into that determines how that individual turns out.

 Much of how an individual responds to their circumstances depends not on the size of their bank account, but rather on what their parents sowed into them when they were young. Parenting—not tax bracket—is the real dividing line between the haves and the have-nots.

 There is a ridiculous myth that has taken root in Western thought. The crux of the myth says that in order to produce a civilized, respectable, God-fearing and useful human being; one is required to have two good incomes, money in the bank, a four-bedroom house in a highly rated school district and a college degree. Nothing could be further from the truth. Things may be helpful, but ultimately things are just things. Things do not produce god-fearing, decent human beings; good parents do.

 Good parents work hard, at menial jobs if necessary, to support their children financially. Good parents model honesty and virtue don’t cheat the social welfare system. Good parents get married before bearing children and do what it takes to stay happily married afterward.

 Good parents introduce the concepts of discipline and self-control early in life understanding that discipline and limits help ensure that children will become law-abiding citizens later. Good parents teach the truth that right and wrong are fixed standards rather than squishy opinions that adjust to the times and setting.

 Good parents value education enough to insist that children stay in school, pay attention to their teachers and do the homework. Good parents demand that that kids respect authority and discipline kids who are disrespectful towards teachers, police and other authority figures. Good parents teach their kids that human beings are obligated by God and human law to do right even when life is hard and circumstances are trying.

 Just as poverty is not an excuse for bad parenting, poor upbringing is not an excuse for bad behavior. People are only savage, soulless animals ruled by circumstances if they wish to be. We are moral beings capable of making moral choices regardless of resources or upbringing. The events of this past week support the notion that we need a rebirth in this country. A rebirth of good parenting, personal responsibility, common sense, and fear of God. When one has those things, they have everything no matter their tax bracket.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Handling Persecution with Grace-

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice inasmuch as you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed~ 1st Peter 4:12-13

 Persecution. It’s a twenty-first century problem.

 According to Open Doors International, every month 322 Christians are killed solely for the offense of being Christian. Two hundred and fourteen Christian churches or Christian owned properties are destroyed. And 722 acts of violence (rapes, beatings, expulsions, abductions, forced marriages) are committed against Christians. At least fifty countries are systematically targeting Christians for extermination; in some countries Christianity is on the edge of extinction.

 Even in countries where Christians are not routinely mistreated, attitudes towards Christians are rapidly shifting. These shifts can be scary and unsettling.

 Christian speech is openly discouraged and sometimes even suppressed in public arenas. The President of the United States recently called out Christians at a Christian prayer breakfast for “not being loving” and glibly equated recent slayings of Christians by Muslim extremists to exploits committed nearly a thousand years ago during the Crusades.

 Christian symbols are being removed from the public square for fear of offending those of other faiths or no faith.Christians who voice views outside accepted social norms are bullied and ridiculed in public forums and have in some cases lost their livelihoods. Many predict that that Christianity or at least some forms of Christian speech will be criminalized in the near future.

 These developments have left many Christians anxious about the future. We are uncertain about what to do for Christians who are experiencing persecution in other countries. There are at least five things Western Christians can and should be doing in these tough times to prepare for the future and help others experiencing persecution.

 #1 Refuse to Panic

 This is not the time to become unnerved, unsettled or weird. Panic benefits no one. Christians have been persecuted in the past and we will be persecuted in the future (1st Thessalonians 3:2-4). This is a time to put our trust in God and put every effort into bolstering our faith through deeper prayer, study, service and friendships with other Christians.

 #2 Commit Already

 Many American Christians have a rather feeble relationship with Jesus. The typical self-identified “committed Christian” attends church an average of 1.5 times per month, does not read or study the Bible regularly, pray, follow Christian teachings, or contribute to Christian causes. None of these behaviors are prerequisites for salvation, but they do reveal commitment level. If your relationship with Jesus looks more like a casual hook-up than a committed relationship, today is the day to get off the fence and start taking your faith seriously.

  #3 Live a Consistent Life

 Everyone agrees that Christians should treat non-Christians with kindness. However, unkindness is not the only only misstep that hurts the cause of Christ. Lifestyle choices inconsistent with biblical teaching, sexual atheism, hypocrisy, publicly bashing Churches and tearing down fellow Christians create just as many issues as unkindness or lack of love. Christians who consistently live inconsistent lives make it easier for unbelievers to rationalize the mocking and mistreatment of Christians.

 #4 Get Out There

 This is not the time for Christians to retreat into their own little worlds. Locate a reliable news outlet and read up on the issues. Find out who your legislators are and contact them regarding issues that concern you, especially issues regarding religious liberty and oppression of Christians around the world. If the legislators in your state don’t care about these issues, work to elect new ones.

 #5 Pray

 Prayer is a neglected discipline. Christians should pray more often, and rethink the substance of our prayers. Most prayers tend to be focused on physical and financial needs rather than the spiritual. God cares deeply about our physical needs but He is truly moved when we ask Him for wisdom, spiritual understanding, and hearts inclined toward repentance. Prayer is the most powerful and consequential thing we can do for persecuted Christians around the world. They need us to pray that they will have peace in the midst of their trials, the strength to endure the pressure, and relief from their tormenters. They pray for us; the least we can do is to return the favor.

 Jesus never promised that life would be easy. Nor did He promise that everyone would like us or grasp our motivations and message. This period of history is shaping up to be one of those times when Christians are misunderstood and sometimes even hated. This is not the time for retreat or compromise. This is a time to deepen our commitment to our God and trust Him with every thing we’ve got.

 

What the Church Must Do to Win the War Against Muslim Extremists

Lisa M. PriceLeave a comment

What does the Lord your God require from you, but to fear the Lord your God, to walk in all His ways and love Him, and to serve the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul~ Deuteronomy 10:12

 I am a competitive person. I am so competitive, in fact, that I inevitably feel like a dirty fraud anytime I am required by circumstance or social custom to repeat the ridiculous axiom we have all heard at least a thousand times:

 It doesn’t matter whether you win or lose; it’s how you play the game that really counts.

 It’s not that I have no regard for the concept of sportsmanship. I do. It’s just that the above-mentioned axiom is not true all or even most of the time. In some instances how well you play is irrelevant if you don’t actually win the game.

 Whether or not one wins or loses a game of baseball or checkers is irrelevant in the grand scheme of history. However, repeatedly being bested by a two-year-old child in a battle of wills could have long-term, possibly even eternal consequences.

 Christianity is locked in a battle with radical Islam for the hearts, minds and souls of the young and searching. Radical Muslims are actively engaged in powerful a recruitment campaign aimed at converting young, aimless Westerners to their worldview.

 Terrorists are peddling a skillfully crafted bill of goods. They promise purpose, significance and tight-knit communities. Islam offers fixed standards of morality to guide people through life in a complex and ever-changing world.

 It’s becoming clear that in some cases the hucksters are playing the game better than we are. Young people with noble intentions are buying into a belief system that will end in earthly bondage and eternal judgment.

 Despite expending untold millions on youth Pastors, coffee bars and programs designed to attract and keep young people, Christian Churches are losing nearly eighty percent of their young adults following graduation. Meanwhile, thousands of Europeans, Canadians and Americans are forsaking Western freedoms for the cause of Islam.

 In a misguided attempt to reach the un-churched, Christians have watered down the very truths that people are starving to hear and Islam has slipped into the void created by our foolish neglect of truth. It’s not too late to turn the tide, but there are three key things we must stop doing if we want to win this game.

 Stop acting friendly and strive to be inclusive

 Christian churches have worked tirelessly in recent years to create welcoming and friendly environments. Leaders have spent countless hours training volunteers to be approachable and friendly. Friendliness is great but it’s community that the world is crying out for. Community is created when Church members go beyond outward friendliness and invite people to become a part of their day-to-day lives. Community and the accountability that comes with it is the key to life-changing discipleship. Authentic community can only occur when folks know and trust one another well enough to comfort in times of trouble and correct wrong behavior when necessary.

 Stop peddling salvation and start teaching people to obey Jesus

 Forgiveness has become the end game of the Christian experience. Many have converted to Christianity without ever learning the crucial discipline of following Jesus. Forgiveness of sin is a benefit of salvation but not be the end goal. Following Jesus requires death to selfishness and a great deal of effort. Self-sacrifice and effort result in lasting change and a deep sense of purpose. Change and purpose occur because Jesus calls us to live beyond ourselves. He takes us to new heights of sacrifice when we heed that call. Youth are crying out for a sense of purpose and yearning for a cause worth sacrificing for. We can give it to them by teaching and modeling the hard work of following Jesus.

Stop treating conviction and judgment as if they are the same thing

 Judgment and conviction sometimes look alike, but they are entirely different. Judgment declares one guilty and deserving of hell. The severe nature of judgment can leave people feeling hopeless and condemned. God is the only one who can rightly judge. Conversely, conviction is a tool that God uses to drive sinful humans towards repentance. Conviction is the sense of guilt that all people feel when they transgress God’s standards of right and wrong. The Church has become so fearful of seeming judgmental that we have dropped discussion of anything that might possibly cause conviction. Our trepidation has left no room for the Holy Spirit to convict the hearts of people.

 For decades now Western Christians have attempted to attract converts by dropping standards and watering down the gospel. It’s becoming increasingly clear that our efforts have failed. It’s time for Christians to get back in the game. The only way to this is to form communities that foster accountability, teach people to follow Jesus (rather than “get saved”) and by communicating truth in a way that leads to conviction rather than complacency.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Some Lessons Christians Can Learn From ISIS-

Lisa M. Price2 Comments

Seek good, and not evil, that you may live; and so the Lord, the God of hosts, will be with you~ Amos 5:14

 In the span of a single year the ISIS terrorist group has gone from being a practically unknown group of upstarts to the most infamous and troubling terrorist group on Earth. The stories simultaneously nauseate and captivate as they invent new and perverse ways to do evil (Romans 1:29-31).

 Decapitations, a man burned alive, little boys executed for watching soccer games, a young American woman murdered for assisting strangers. Coptic Christians brutally slain for refusing to convert to Islam. Gay men thrown off buildings, churches burned to the ground, homes ransacked. Christians, young and old, male and female, kidnapped and held prisoner, threatened with death for refusing to convert.

 We ignore this phenomenon at our own peril. We will never defeat something we don’t understand, and these people are successfully reaching folks with their message—especially the young, and not just the young and ignorant: Many ISIS converts are surprisingly well-educated men and women.

 The success of ISIS’ brazen recruitment programs demand the sober consideration of every God-fearing human being on Earth. According to CNN, CIA spokespersons report that thousands of American, French, Canadian and English men have linked with ISIS and are now fighting in Syria. Young women from England, France and America have left comfortable homes and forsaken Western freedoms to become brides and baby makers for Muslim extremists seeking to construct a society built on their brutal and archaic way of viewing the world.

 These realities beg some very important questions: How is a brutal group of thugs intent upon stripping the human race of every imaginable freedom making disciples out of young Westerners who ought to be repulsed by these people? Why would anyone choose to become a part of this community? What are they doing right? How do we stop them?

 These questions must be answered quickly. These groups are spreading like a pernicious form of cancer. Like it or not these terrorist groups understand some truths regarding the human condition that we have foolishly overlooked. It pains me to say this, but I believe there are some things Christians can learn from ISIS.

 Terrorists groups like ISIS understand that humans need a cause greater than themselves to live for. Human existence becomes bleak and meaningless when life becomes all about making money, acquiring stuff and personal gratification.

 Terrorist groups exploit the universal human longing for purpose and significance in life with their own twisted vision of purpose. Terrorists target young men and women who have just enough spiritual awareness to be open to a cause, any cause. They give the men and women who searching for significance and purpose something tangible to live for, sacrifice for, and fight for.

 Furthermore, terrorists exploit the human longing for fixed standards of right and wrong. In an effort to reach those yearning for moral guidance and leadership, they bombard their followers with instruction concerning morality, social interaction between the sexes, modesty, parenting, family relationships and business dealings. ISIS has recently released a guide instructing Islamic women on how to become “the ultimate wives of Jihad.”

 Terrorists also understand the human longing for community. They entice young people with the message that they can become part of a group of like-minded individuals who will care for one another when life gets tough. Islamic communities tend to be tight-knit and very close; this is a big draw for young people raised in fractured nuclear families and with non-existent extended families.

 Sadly, terrorists are selling the lost and searching a flim-flam job. The naïve are being lured with a message of death cleverly disguised as life and sacrifice. Their spiritual longings will be wasted. They will face an eternity of judgment for their foolish gullibility.

 Christians have the real deal to offer the world, but we have packaged it all wrong. The fear of coming off as judgmental has overruled truth and we have failed to present a complete picture of saving faith. We have done so to our everlasting shame and to the peril of millions who are longing for a narrow path and a cause worth living and dying for.

 We have a cause that is worth living and dying for: Jesus. Jesus calls his people to a narrow path of holiness, righteousness and sacrificial love (Matthew 7:13-14). Jesus calls His people to create caring communities where we admonish the unruly, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, and are patient with everyone (1st Thessalonians 5:14). Jesus calls His people to the greatest cause of all: life and sacrifice for Him.

 

 

 

A Response to the Guy Who Called My Views on Marriage Naive

Lisa M. Price4 Comments

 You do well when you obey the Holy Writings which say, “You must love your neighbor as you love yourself”~ James 2:8 NLV  

Dear Guy who called my views on marriage naïve (AKA Tim),

 Contrary to how things probably look, I really am not a jerk who has been ignoring you or your comment. It appeared in my inbox late Monday night and, frankly, it was long and I was tired, too tired to read it thoroughly, let alone formulate a lucid response. When I did get around to giving your comment a thorough reading, it didn’t take me long to realize your feelings on the subject of marriage merited more of a forum than a hasty reply would allow.

So here goes.

 Your comment was polite and articulate (a rare thing in the blogosphere). However, it did seem to indicate that you’ve had some unfortunate personal experiences with marriage and for that I am truly sorry. It is not my intention to underplay the power of your personal experience or the experiences of millions of people who have faced the pain of divorce. I have never experienced the trauma of divorce. However, I do have friends and family members who have, and even from the outside looking in, it’s clear that divorce sucks. Everything humanly possible should be done to prevent it.

 All that being said, it’s really not fair to blame marriage when marriages end. Contrary to popular belief, marriage is not an entity or a living being or even an institution. Marriage is a contract—a legal, moral and spiritual contract—and every contract becomes over time a situation involving people. A contract cannot be blamed for the conduct of the parties who signed on to the terms of the deal.  

Responsibility for the death of a relationship has to lie squarely at the feet of the people in the relationship. Admittedly, fault is seldom equally distributed. One party quite often carries the lion’s share of the blame for the demise of the relationship. Marriages struggle and end for many reasons, but at the root of all lay almost always one or two issues.

 The roots of divorce frequently go back to unrealistic expectations long before the “I do’s.” The romantic notion of soul mates has set up millions of couples for failure. The myth of the “right one” is a silly fairytale. No matter how well matched and compatible a couple is in the beginning, no marriage can survive gross mismanagement of the relationship.

 Furthermore, marriage will not make an unhappy person happy, nor will marriage solve underlying problems or character issues in the lives of the people getting married. Weddings are not magic bullets we can shoot at loneliness, laziness, poor self-image, meanness, sloppy relationship skills or general discontent. Those problems must be dealt with long before the wedding day or the relationship will be doomed.

 Selfishness is a cancer that kills many marriages. Self-centeredness shows up in big and little ways in marriage. Rudeness, cheating, overspending, laziness, stinginess, dishonesty, withholding sex and lack of attention to the likes and dislikes of the other person all reveal a heart that is unwilling to work on the relationship. Perhaps self-centeredness is epitomized most clearly in a refusal to apologize, acknowledge bad behavior and take responsibility for problems in the relationship.  

Unhealthy patterns of communication are another relationship killer. Giving the silent treatment, name-calling, screaming, criticizing and relentlessly bringing up past misdeeds is a sure-fire way to effectively poison a marriage.  

You called my views on marriage naïve because I listed the established benefits of a stable, happy marriage. The benefits of matrimony include good physical and mental health, financial security, well-adjusted children and a good sex life. It is not naïve to believe in something that has been proven. Naiveté is found in believing that there is somehow a superior, less painful alternative to marriage.  

The alternatives to marriage are limited: cohabitation, serial monogamy and singleness. Singleness is not a realistic alternative for most of us, leaving cohabitation and serial monogamy. Cohabitation and serial monogamy offer none of the benefits to individuals, children and society that marriage does and yet the end of those relationships are every bit as psychologically painful and financially costly as divorce.

 Marriage is not perfect, Tim, because people are not perfect. The solution to the problems in marriages is not to look for a viable alternative to marriage. Nor is the answer to avoid marriage altogether; the world would be a dull and gloomy place indeed without the security and camaraderie of enduring relationships. The answer to the marriage quandary is to educate people, before and after they say “I do,” on how to have the kind of relationships everyone wants to have. The real solution is to gently come alongside those who are struggling in their relationships and show them a better, less painful alternative to divorce.